back to school

What Your Child/Teen Wants You to Know about ADHD

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ADHD helpHey Mom/Dad (or Parent),

We are about to start a new school year and I am worried and scared that it will be like last year. I really do want to do well, but my ADHD keeps getting in the way and I don’t know what to do about it.

I do know that I get very upset when you raise your voice (yell) at me or ask me things like, “why didn’t you…” and then my brain just shuts down. I want you to be proud of me but, when your voice is loud or you use a different tone of voice, it makes me think you are mad at me. Could we celebrate my successes more and not focus so much on my grades because I am doing my best?

I know I forget things but reminding me a hundred times doesn’t help me remember. In fact, each time you interrupt me while I am doing my homework, it adds 15-20 more minutes for me to refocus on what I was doing. No wonder I finish my homework right before bedtime. I’d like to have some free time before bed to relax and chill out. Maybe that way I would be able to fall asleep faster and feel better in the morning.

How about we don’t talk about homework when I get home and instead let me have a snack, as I am having lunch very early and then I can to outside, or relax, and recharge a bit before starting homework. Then after about a ½ hour (say 4pm) I will start on my homework. Don’t ask me what I have for homework if I don’t have my agenda open in front of me. That’s why I write it down – so I don’t have to remember it. No interruptions please! I will take short breaks so if you have something to ask me, please wait until then.

I would appreciate it if every week you would tell me what appointments or after school activities I have, so I can put them in my agenda/planner. I don’t like surprises or changes in plans! And I don’t want to have something EVERY day after school. I need time to myself, to do what makes me happy so I can recharge.

I like to be able to predict what comes next, so if you can help me figure out a good bedtime and wake up time so I have time to do everything I need to without missing the bus, that would be helpful. (Use an alarm clock, not a phone.) If you help me make it a habit, then you won’t have to remind me of every step I need to do. That would be a relief! I can sometimes still hear your voice telling me what to do when I am on the bus.

Also, can we get all the clothes that no longer fit me, out of my dresser? It is so hard to find what I want to wear. I need fewer options and I need to figure out what to wear, the night before. My room needs help too. It is always so messy that I can’t work at my desk. What can we do to make it work better?

As for my homework….I don’t need you to check it for accuracy because that is my teacher’s job. I don’t need the answers either, but sometimes I just cannot understand the directions, or I have forgotten how to do it, or it is just too boring or complicated. Encourage me to think of other resources I can use to find the answers or help me break it down into more manageable pieces.

Let’s use technology where it can help me with reminders and alarms but save the gaming stuff for after my work is done. You know how easily I can get distracted:-p

Please tell me later if I said or did something that upset my friend as sometimes, I have no clue what he meant by what he said or how his face looked. Friendships are hard, but really important to me. I want to be a good friend.

Please be patient with me as I learn new skills. My teacher says that my brain isn’t fully developed yet and that I might need help developing strategies to help myself. I don’t need your strategies, just your help in figuring out what will work for me. And I like simple and easy.

So, if we can work together on these things, with patience and understanding that I am doing my best, I think I will be more independent and have more confidence in what I can do for myself.

Thanks Mom, (or Dad) I know you want the best for me, but this is who I am right now. With your help I can grow in a positive, self-confident way and take on the world!

Love,

Your child/teen with ADHD

Top Three Challenges (and Solutions) for Back to School

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The kids are back in school. YAY! Take a moment to celebrate the start of the new school year with all its possibilities. September is often a great month for establishing new habits and routines. If you feel that the mornings are rushed or you are frustrated when it comes to homework time, then read on for some solutions to help.
Three common challenges once school begins:
Challenge 1: How do I make morning routines work so I am not guiding or coercing my children and teens every step of the way?
        • Start with a set bedtime and figure out how much time it takes your children/teens to get into bed (this helps them wake up rested)
        • Have a prep time before bed when kids put their clothes out for the next day, pack up the backpack and place it near the door and decide what they want for breakfast, lunch and/or snacks. Find the water bottle and rinse out. Charge devices in a central spot and not in the bedrooms
        • Put alarm clocks in their rooms and show them how to set the alarm for a reasonable time to wake up (we don’t want the slow movers to have to hustle – but you also don’t want too much extra time for them to get distracted)
        • Set a timer as a warning for the bus (Alexa works great for this)
        • Depending on age, create a list, picture or have a mirror for them to check that they have everything they need to be ready before they head out the door. No slippers allowed
Challenge 2: How do I get my kids to get started on their homework?
      • Everyone needs a break after school. It is a great time for a snack break and a little physical activity. Both of those things will help stir up the dopamine needed to reactivate the brain for homework. Usually, 30-45 minutes is plenty.
      • Take the time to find out how their day went while things are still fresh in their mind. Don’t try to solve their problems but show them that you are truly listening and hearing them by using reflective listening.
      • Set a specific start time for homework and have a reminder timer set so they can hear it
      • At the beginning stay close by (and pretend you are working on something) just to see if they can get themselves started or if they might need help
      • If a timer is motivating you can ask your child how long to set it for and then allow them a short 5-7 minute break when it goes off. (Set the timer for the break too)
Challenge 3: How do I get my kids to finish their homework in a reasonable amount of time?
      • Most homework subjects can be completed in 30 minutes or less so setting a timer for about the same amount of time makes it easier to take a break after one subject is completed
      • Reduce the distractions – Move the cellphone away from the work zone just enough that your teen will need to get up to check it. After a while, they will turn the notifications off and/or stop getting up to check it. That also means no TV on in the background or younger siblings making loud noises nearby. It is hard enough to concentrate on homework without wondering what they are missing out on too.
      • Don’t book an afterschool activity every day of the week. Kids need a day that they can recharge and have some fun before they hit the books.
      • If your child struggles to stay focused, think about creating a buddy study time with a friend. It works like a “body double” where they have a better chance to stay working as long as their friend is working too.
      • Timing is key. Homework done after dinner takes longer to do as the blood that should be in the brain, is busy digesting dinner in the stomach. Homework done 2+ hours after school, has interrupted that “student” mindset and can take longer to get back into the “work mode.” Ideally, within 45-60 minutes after arriving home is the best time to get focused on homework.
      • For elementary and middle school students, homework should be able to be completed by dinner. That gives the rest of the evening for R & R. When teens feel they have the entire evening, until bedtime to complete their work, they often find it takes them that long or longer. Then they wonder why it is difficult to fall asleep when their brain is still processing the last 30 minutes of work they did. Setting boundaries/limits around homework time and keeping to the same start time each day will help your children get more done in less time.

If routines, habits and homework are constant battles in your home, and you would like to increase cooperation, communication and lower the stress level in your home – then let us help. Contact us today about coaching.

Back to School and Life Edition

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Organize backpackAre you prepared for another school year? I recently looked at the list of supplies that some schools are asking for and it can easily become overwhelming – especially for the students to keep organized.

Preparedness – what does that mean? Webster defines it as, “the quality or state of being prepared.” To be prepared, means you are ready to do or deal with something. Let’s use that as our “working definition” for back to school. What does your family need to do to be prepared for back to school?

Let’s break it down into three big categories:

1. Routines

2. Organization

3. Supplies

Routines

  • Let’s start getting kids to bed earlier and waking them up around the time they will need to get up for school. Sometimes we like to use just enough time to get up and out the door and others need wake up time, time for meds to kick in or just a slow wake up – so make sure you allow enough time for whatever your kids need.
  • Morning routines are easiest if there is a set order to the actions the kids need to do and they have memorized that order. Having a list that they can check if they forget, may save you from repeating yourself (fingers crossed). Also, it is better to ask, “what do you need to do next?” instead of telling them what to do. You might want to set your alarm a bit earlier than that so you have time for yourself to get ready or enjoy that first cup of coffee.
  • A homework routine that begins around the same time every day and a space to do it in. Doesn’t matter where it is, but it should have access to supplies they might need so there are fewer distractions. Minimize distractions and be sure to have a homework buddy your kids can call for help. This is a great time for you to “body double” with kids that have a hard time getting started on their work. Use this time to deal with your paperwork within sight of where your kids are working. Kids can create their own homework routine in our Super Skills for Students Class for Middle and High School students.
  • Set up for tomorrow including setting clothes out each evening, repacking backpacks and putting them near the door. Figure out what is for snack and/or lunch and breakfast. Make sure ice packs are back in the freezer. Are you heading to work? Pack up what you need and make the decisions tonight rather than in the morning.
  • Weekly clean out routine on Sunday as you prep for the week ahead. Everyone needs to know what is going on in the next week and having a family meeting can help. A good time to clean out your pocketbook, backpack or bag and maybe a quick check of the car too – how’s the gas level?

  Organization

  • Key organization tips are to have a landing pad near the door where backpacks, jackets and shoes can be left the night before. Good place for your keys, bag and anything leaving the house.
  • Set up the bedrooms so that kids can easily find their clothes. All clothes should fit into storage whether that is on a shelf, in a bin or basket or in a drawer or closet. The easier to grab, the more likely they will. Too many clothes can often make it difficult to make a decision – help them put together 5 outfits for the week and use a sweater hanger in a closet. Hooks are very handy for sweatshirts, sweaters, etc.
  • Calendars with the schedule of activities, where everyone can see it and it can be reviewed for those kids that don’t like surprises. Advance notice of what is coming up each week and reminders or a visual schedule in a place to be easily seen. Talk about the upcoming year – listen to your child’s concerns and take them seriously. Visit the school if they are switching to a new building – make sure they know where the cafeteria is and the bathrooms on each floor and the fastest way to their locker.
  • Make sure all supplies fit EASILY into the backpack – kids will not fuss with lunchboxes they need to stuff into their backpacks – they are more likely to leave them somewhere. They do not need to take the entire package of #2 pencils with them. Keep the reserves at home along with extra paper, project board, markers, etc. that might be needed for a project. That will save you a trip to the store at the last minute.
  • Charging all devices in one spot each night.
  • Write down the necessary passwords and log in steps for accessing grades and homework as well as, remote learning if needed and have your children do the same (get a copy of those).

 Supplies

  • When buying supplies don’t look for the cheapest, but look for the most durable. Kids are rough on their supplies, especially binders. The binders should open easily with one hand, not two and be no bigger than 1.5 inches (it can hold 350 pages)any bigger and it is difficult to fit into the backpack and it weighs more. Backpacks should not weigh more than 10% of your child’s weight.
  • Food – Breakfast ideas that kids can prepare for themselves or make ahead ideas to easily grab.
  • Have handy snacks, drinks, and lunch supplies or set up the school account (have reserves of their favorites)
  • Medications for colds and flu, and also covid tests, to have on hand. Masks too, just in case we revert back.

Celebrate by taking a picture before they head out. (Taking an “after” pic might also be memorable.) At the end of the day, celebrate by doing something special but keep it low key as they will be tired. For kids, it is like starting a new job, there are a lot of unknowns but it is also a fresh start and the opportunity to shine. Keeping the stress level down in the home can make it a smoother year. Good luck!

PS Other articles from our Archives you might find helpful

5 Things Your Child Needs to Know Before School Starts

Change Your Mindset – Raise Your Self-Esteem

Five Super Strategies to Knockout Stress

Helping or Hurting? The Dilemma of Enabling vs. Empowering

“I’m Bored!” – Now What?

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Encourage problem solvingProblem solving skills. We use them all the time at work, school, home and in social situations. They help us locate our keys, or solve a problem at work. For kids, they help them learn and think on their own without waiting to be told what to do.

The definition, according to Merriam Webster, is “the process or act of finding a solution to a problem.” When bosses, teachers and parents provide the next steps to solving a problem, then there is no true problem-solving practice. Without practice, our “solutions” can be anything from an impulsive response, to paralysis, where we do nothing and the problem is never solved or there are consequences that were never contemplated. Do you want to be able to trust that your children can make the right decisions when it comes to problem solving?

It can make for a long summer if you often hear, “I’m bored,” “I’m hungry” or, “Where are my shoes” and then your child or teen waits for you to suggest what they should do next. Often in our rush to get the kids to do what they need to do; we simply tell them what to do rather than having them think about it and figure it out for themselves. Have you supplied the snack or told your child where to locate their shoes recently? Providing an “instant” solution rather than allowing your child or teen to solve it themselves can create a dependency that delays their journey towards independence.

Problem solving skills are important in simple decisions we make every day. Our children are faced with a variety of challenges throughout their day, in school and out. Without the ability to come up with options, children may choose to avoid situations which can make things worse.

How to encourage problem solving:

      •     Use humor for example, “Hello, hungry, I’m Mom.”
      •     Ask an open-ended question, “I wonder where I would be if I were a shoe?”
      •     Identify the actual problem
      •     Suggest you brainstorm possible solutions together and then discuss pros and cons of each
      •     Allow your child to pick a solution and see what happens

Five Advantages to Developing Strong Problem-Solving Skills

1.  Problem Solve to Avoid Boredom

When children are home during the summer, there is often unstructured time even if they are off to camp programs. Switching from a structured program to non-structured can sometimes be overwhelming. With so many choices they can have difficulty making a decision. Sometimes it is difficult for children to decide what to do in the moment. Creating a “menu” of choices together can help inspire them without having you run through their choices. Coming up with the ideas is often the stumbling block – even for adults, so having a ready made “menu” avoids that challenge.

2.   How to prevent the problem from happening again

Once your child has solved a problem, make sure they understand what made that such a challenge and ask what they can do to prevent it from happening again. This can range from the basic, put your shoes in the same spot every day to remembering to be a thoughtful listener when their friends are talking. Discussing social situations before and/or after can help your child practice those “being a good friend” skills of listening, negotiating, taking turns, playing fair, etc.

3.   Natural consequences

Let them make their own decision whether you agree with it or not and allow for natural consequences to happen (as long as they are safe). This opens the door for a discussion on other things they might want to consider next time. What did they forget about? Cause and effect skills develop from comparing the pros and cons.

4.   Build Independence Skills

Creating routines, making sure there are routines and structure at home that children can depend on. Children need to trust that certain things will happen regularly. It is important they understand they are part of a team and should also be expected to contribute to daily life at home.

Help them learn how to solve problems and/or build skills. Ask what they would do and why to help brainstorm solutions and strategies. Discussing the pros and cons of each can then lead to better decisions being made.

Build positive self-talk and let them hear you problem solve by voicing your thoughts out loud to role model the process.

5.   Self confidence

When kids succeed be sure to praise their effort and not just a generalized compliment that praises something they cannot control (intelligence, looks, etc.). Encourage a growth mindset attitude that emphasizes the effort and encourages perseverance to attain the goal, rather than the goal itself. As they see how effective they are, they will become more self-confident.

Failure is part of the learning process – as the song says, “nobody learns without getting it wrong.” So, let your kids, “try everything” and see what happens.

Everyone benefits from working on and encouraging problem solving skills. It’s simple, according to verywellfamily.com, once you identify the problem, then brainstorm several options, nothing is off limits. Now, go back through those options and identify the pros and cons. Pick a solution that looks good and try it out. Is it a success or do you need to try another solution? More practice, the better the skills.

Enjoy the rest of the summer!

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Hey Students! Organize Yourself for the New Learning Environment (Whether it is Remote, Hybrid, In Person, or Combined)

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Back to schoolThere is so much to think about as the new school year begins. With the pandemic continuing, each town has devised its own plan for what “school” will look like this fall. For some that may include half or full days, or a combination of two days in school and three remote or every other day or every other week. So many options, I cannot begin to cover them all. However, many of the schools are starting two weeks later than usual. Don’t let that fool you. It’s time to get organized! Where to begin?

The toughest part of any hybrid learning model is going to be staying organized. There are in person assignments to organize and remote work as well. Fluctuating schedules to keep track of, technology to keep charged and log in information to organize. Then of course there is organizing oneself for this new method of learning. Whew!

Let’s start with the easy stuff. Where will you work? You want to have one place to work where you have all the supplies and space you need. It needs to be comfortable, but not too comfy. Make sure the lighting is good and that you are not working in your own shadow. Get a comfortable chair where your feet can touch the floor. Keep it distraction free – but hang photos that make you feel good. How will you keep track of everything? Do you use your phone or a paper planner, or sticky notes? The best one, is the one that works for you. Make it a habit to put everything in it though, so nothing can fall through the cracks.

Next organize your technology. Make sure you have all the log in information for the websites you need to log onto and the password information. Set up folders for each subject on your device. Create a reminder for turning assignments in as that is often a step that can easily get missed. If you have a way to track what is passed in, then if it “gets lost” you have proof. Move the chargers to your new space so that your equipment does not have to be moved to be charged. Turn notifications off by putting privacy settings on while you are doing your homework. You can spend all night working or you can get it done effectively and have some well-deserved downtime for yourself. Which would you rather do?

Now your materials will need to include hand sanitizer and masks as well as all the standard stuff. Chances are you will have less paper to keep track of this year so why not go with a small notebook or binder that has room for all your classes. If you keep it cleaned out of the completed topics you should easily be able to fit a full term’s worth of papers in a 1- or 11/2-inch notebook. That should hold between 200 and 300 pages. That does include the necessary weekly clean out of papers no longer needed. Maintaining your supplies is important too. You may need reminders to carry a spare mask or two with you or weekly refilling of your hand sanitizer and a disinfecting spray of the backpack and wipe down of your tech.

To organize yourself, may end up being the most challenging part of this school year. You have an obligation to yourself and your family to do your best to stay healthy. That requires regular health habits including sleep which can be difficult for teens. It will mean keeping your materials clean and switching out your mask daily. Students need to find time to be active, whether it is playing a sport or shooting hoops in the driveway, something that keeps those synapses happy.

You will need to realize that this is probably not the way your teacher had hoped the year would start out either. Teachers are working extra hard to juggle all the pieces of the hybrid plan and have to be flexible enough to adapt if things should change. They have families too and may not be as available as they would normally be for providing extra support. You will need to take that responsibility on yourself. Make sure that you understand the concepts that are being presented and don’t wait to discover you did poorly on the exam before looking for help. Can you explain the key points of the topic to yourself? Then spend time studying what you DON’T know. Take good notes in case you need to use them to teach yourself.

How much time do you spend doing your homework? If you allow distractions to interrupt you, you are taking away from your focus and adding about 20 minutes more to your work time to regain that level of focus. Take short breaks in between assignments and give your brain some nourishment and process time. It will thank you by working more efficiently – saving you time and energy in the end. Also take five minutes to put everything back where it belongs when you are done working.

Good luck, stay healthy and stop the spread by doing your part. This will be a year unlike any other!

Back to School Tips

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Back to school banner

BTS Tip 6: Back to school is usually about getting the kids ready, but what about you? Are you tolerating things that could be changed – just because it is easier to deal than to change it?
How’s your kitchen? Is it functional, organized and convenient? For example, are the things you need for breakfast and packing a lunch with snacks easily accessible? How about the things you use for dinner prep – are they handy? Then why are you working so hard? Reduce your own decision fatigue by making it work. Lowering your stress level is worth it!
31 Days of Back to School Organization on our FaceBook page. Like our page so you won’t miss them.

 

Habits – Good or Bad?

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good habits for EFsWhy did you do that? “I don’t know” is often the response. Sometimes we are on automatic pilot and our actions are the results of a habit. Other times our actions can be the result of a lack of impulse control. What is a habit? A habit is “an acquired behavior pattern regularly followed until it has become almost involuntary” (Source: Dictionary.com). Think about the things you do every day without having to think about them. What would it feel like if you could change just one “bad” habit or could add one “good” habit?

If you are not sure if a habit serves you or not you may want to look closer at it. Monitoring an action or habit is a great way to figure out what the true impact is on you. You would need to be able to measure it. For example, keeping track of how much TV you watch (hours/day) instead of just deciding to “watch less TV.” See the difference?

Good habit or bad habit they both have three things in common. According to Charles Duhigg in his book, The Power of Habit, a habit consists of a cue, a routine and a reward. Add in a craving for that reward and you’ve got yourself a habit – whether it is good or bad. To change it you would need to interrupt the cycle. Change the cue (ex. ding of a new email), the routine (checking your phone as you pick it up) or the reward (quick dopamine rush that happens in your brain and makes you feel good when on Facebook). You didn’t start out craving it, but after several times your brain started liking the feeling and ta dah! A habit was formed.

Changing just one habit can have a profound effect on your life. Where to start? Gretchen Rubin, in her book, Better Than Before, suggests that starting with habits that will help strengthen our self-control can serve as the “foundation for forming other good habits.” “They are: sleep, move, eat and drink right and unclutter.” Do you need to create a new habit in one of these categories? Start slow and look at the three parts of the habit (cue, routine and reward) and design an experiment to help you figure out the plan that will work best for you and the way your brain works. Tweak it if it doesn’t work but don’t give up – the long term reward will be worth it.

Now for your kids, they need help establishing habits that serve them. Some examples would be a morning and evening habit of what to do in what order. Often those with ADHD don’t have consistent habits and every day is a “new” routine. This puts extra pressure on their working memory and makes it very brain intensive to think through the steps of what to do next. Help your kids figure out a routine and a reward and then link the cue to something they already do automatically. It is easier to start that way. Other options for kids are homework habits; the habit of using an agenda, backpack habits, studying habits….the list goes on. We can help them take a look at their habits and figure out what is and isn’t serving them so they start the new school year off strong. Check out our Academic Coaching Classes for Middle School and High School.

Change 2.0

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change buttonThere are only a few weeks left until the new school year starts and we all transition into the start of fall. If you had the power to change one thing about this time of year…..what would it be? Think about that for a few minutes and maybe write down a few things. Now pick the one that would make the biggest impact on your life. Stop dreaming about things like losing 20 pounds, getting organized once and for all, finding a new job, being less stressed or anything else that is on your mind and start changing your life TODAY!

I know from experience that sometimes, no usually, change is hard and often we don’t try until we reach a breaking point. That’s what happened to me almost 32.5 years ago when I “got organized.” What I have learned in the years since then has made a bigger impact on my life than getting organized did.

  • No one succeeds instantly
  • Change takes time
  • Relapses are normal
  • You CAN succeed!
  • You have to be flexible
  • It is worth the effort – no matter how many times you have failed before
  • The end result is better than you could ever imagine!

Often times we get so caught up in the moment that we don’t take the time to think through and problem solve what it is we are struggling with. I see this all the time with my clients, they “don’t know why x happens”, and they just accept it as if it is out of their control. But they ARE the one in control – with every decision or lack of decision. If you are ready to make a change, these steps can help:

  1. Analyze what it is you want to change? How is this impacting your life? What would your life be like if this wasn’t bothering you? Dream big!
  2. What would this change look like? Start with the end result and work your way backwards to the smallest step you can take today.
  3. Make space in your life for this change. How long do you need to work on this new “habit” in order to see a change? Where in your day can you find the 10 or 15 minutes you need to build this new habit? Link this time slot to a habit you already have like brushing your teeth, etc.
  4. Set reminders on your phone, put up sticky notes, find an accountability partner, or whatever else will help you remember this new time slot.
  5. Keep track of your success by using a chart, app or tick marks on a whiteboard, whatever will show you how you are doing. Reward yourself after “X” number of positive successes. Don’t expect perfection. New habits can take up to 300 practices before you “own” them.

Lastly, don’t forget that new habits, systems and routines need maintenance. Life interrupts but it doesn’t have to derail. Forgive yourself and get back to it. If you find you are starting over frequently, go back and take a look at steps 1-5. If it is important to you…..it’s worth fighting for, don’t you think?

Good luck with whatever it is that you want to change. I am working on getting to bed at a consistent time each night something I am constantly struggling with. Please share your struggles and successes in the comments below.

Summer Fun to Build Executive Function Skills

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blooms-taxonomy-2-150x150Summer’s here and the learning never stops! Sure no one wants to even think about school during July and August. I understand that. But if your son or daughter struggles in school with organization, planning or focusing long enough to get through homework, then you might want to build some of their executive function skills this summer while having some fun. Below are three executive function skills with some activities you can do to strengthen them. Once you start to see your child/teen improving you’ll want to be sure they “transfer” their learning to school and their life by asking questions such as: “How might a stronger memory help in school?” or “What a fun day. Your plan was organized and we had everything we needed. Can you think of any other ways that great planning might be helpful?” Don’t forget to mention whenever you use planning, or working memory strategies so that your son or daughter sees that those skills are used every day.

According to Bloom’s new hierarchy of skills the first step is the ability to remember. Working memory has been defined as being able to hold onto information long enough to use and/or manipulate it. For example, understanding the rules of a new game and being able to play it while keeping track of other players’ moves uses the working memory.

Here are some ideas to increase working memory skills during the summer:

  • Write it down! Use a planner, smartphone app (Google Calendar, Color note, Evernote, Remember the Milk, Hiveminder, etc.), or notepad to keep track of events, vacation, etc. so you don’t overburden your working memory.
  • Practice setting reminders in your phone for fun things because the summer is less structured.
  • Play the “I went to Grandma’s house and I brought my….” game that uses all the letters of the alphabet. Each person must repeat what was said before. I went to Grandma’s house and I brought my apple, blanket, cow, daffodil, etc.
  • Memorize license plates and repeat them backwards
  • Hold a family competition to name the 50 states, presidents or capitals.
  • Play card games or Memory type game
  • Bake cookies and keep two ingredients in your memory before looking again at the recipe.

planner-150x150Planning skills include the ability to organize your thoughts in a logical manner to accomplish a goal. It requires sequencing and figuring out the individual steps needed to get to completion. Students that struggle with story or essay writing, long term projects or even getting all their homework done may have a weak “planning” skill.

Here are some ideas to build “planning” during the summer:

  • As mentioned above, have your child/teen plan out their summer reading and math packet time on a calendar.
  • Plan a day trip and include all necessary details. Walk through it to check that everything important is included. Don’t forget museums, historic places, and parks.
  • Cook like they do on TV. Get out the ingredients and measure them all out first before beginning. Pick a new recipe and plan the shopping list and determine the cost before going.
  • Geocaching – pick where you want to go, what you need to bring with you, etc.
  • Pack for a day at the beach or camp – check before leaving that everything is included. Start with the end in mind.
  • Puzzles and brain teasers are fun. For the young ones “find the differences” activities involve creating a plan of where to look in an organized manner that you’ll need to show them. How will they put together a puzzle that doesn’t have any straight edges?
  • Discuss their video game strategies with them. Have them explain their approach. Better yet, play with them and discuss as you go.
  • Plan a scavenger hunt
  • Build a bird house or race car (Lowe’s sells kits for kids)

Time management starts by developing time awareness. Here are a few suggestions for activities that will get the family going and develop an understanding of time:

  • Time activities like emptying the dishwasher, setting the table, feeding the dog, reading 10 pages, etc. after your child/teen has estimated how long it will take.
  • Create an obstacle course and post the times to beat (give younger kids a few minute cushion).
  • Hold the family “Olympic games” and have everyone compete against themselves over the course of a few weeks.
  • How many baskets/goals can they get in one minute? Jump rope for one minute.
  • Start a monopoly game or “Life” and play for an hour each night until someone wins.

Have some fun and please share your activities on our FaceBook​ page. Check out our upcoming classes here.

The Busyness of Back to School – Five Steps to Calm the “Crazy”

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Doing skill posterSo much to do, so little time…..I hope that is not what you are thinking as we reach the end of August. It is a busy month for sure and often the transition from summer to “school” can make the new situation seem even more challenging. Here are five things to think about to make this year more manageable, less stressful and not quite as “crazy” as last year.

  1. Each school year is a new start. Although each grade comes with its own challenges, it also comes with its own rewards. Major transitions are in first, fourth, six (or whatever grade your middle school starts at) and 9th grade. If it’s a new school, take time to tour it and find the bathrooms, locker, lunch room and office. Notice when your child is struggling – is it a lack of understanding, frustration, distraction or boredom? It’s a new start for you as well. Set yourself a goal of making this a calmer, more organized year and notice what is getting in the way. This year fix it so that tomorrow is better than today.
  2. Don’t overbook. Children need time to play and be outdoors and they can’t do that if they are overbooked and running from one activity to another. Make choices and remember homework should not be an afterthought. Don’t expect your child to have any energy left for homework if they are going all day long. They have a right to some “free” time too and need it to recharge, so make sure homework doesn’t use up all available time. Sleep 8+ hours is best. Remember your role in extra curricula activities, are you the pick up or drop off person? What does that mean for your schedule and for the family’s evening?
  3. Get organized! This is probably the most important thing you can do for yourself and your family. When the morning runs smoothly, the day goes better too. It’s important to have routines and habits that serve you and the family like a morning routine, an evening routine that includes getting ready for the next day, a regular shopping day or at least a meal plan so you know what is for dinner each night. Having a family meeting helps everyone know what is up for the week with extra curricula activities and/or appointments.
  4. Prepare for the week ahead. Everybody knows that having clean clothes makes getting dressed easier. Same goes for having a clean and organized backpack, it makes the homework go easier. Take the time to prepare what you can for the week ahead. Some ideas are laundry done, snacks and food choices, rooms picked up and backpacks organized. Use a planner whether it is digital or paper doesn’t matter but the pace of your life means you shouldn’t rely on your memory without some backup. Use the reminder app on your phone for really important things.
  5. Lastly, if your child has ADHD or Executive functioning challenges, then no amount of coaxing, rewarding, threatening or seizing of things they hold dear, is going to help them get their work done any faster or better. Imagine what it would be like if they understood what was getting in the way of their success and had some strategies that they could use to push through the homework. You have the power to make this year better for the entire family by helping them develop the strategies and understanding they need to be successful. We can help too.