Laine

Tip for the Week: Dinner Plans

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Time saver tipMake a menu plan for this upcoming week. Whether you put it into your electronic or paper calendar or post a note on the refrigerator, it doesn’t matter as long as for the week you don’t have to think about what’s for dinner.  Remember to look at the afterschool activities to get an idea of how much time you really have to prepare something. Pick only those meals that you have everything for. Look at the plan the night before so you know what you are making the next day. Is there anything you can do to speed up the process – like take the meat out of the freezer and put it in the refrigerator to thaw or cut up the vegetables?

With the time you save, help your child organize the papers in their backpack. It may be the fourth term but it is not too late to pull up those grades and it starts by organizing their papers so they can find what they need when they need it. See our blog on Organizing Children’s Papers.

Next meeting of the POCWA (Parents of Children with ADHD/ADD) group meets May 3rd at the Hingham Library at 7pm. If you’ve got kids with ADHD, we’ve got strategies to help.

What's for Dinner?

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What's for dinner?Arsenic hour – that’s what I used to call it. It’s that late afternoon hour when you are trying to coordinate sports pick up, homework help and cooking dinner. Everyone seems to need something at the time you need to be thinking about dinner.

The “Leave it to Beaver” era of having two parents and the children all home at the same time for a sit down dinner, is long gone. Parents are travelling for work, others are working two jobs, or working late hours, or spend hours in traffic – and it all impacts the stress level at home.

At the end of a busy day, the last thing you want to do is think about what’s for dinner, so stopping on the way home is an enticing option. Down deep though, you know it may not be the healthiest choice to make. Having a meal plan ready can save you the time and frustration of having to think about creating a dinner out of what is on hand. You can use a simple calendar (create a blank one in word or publisher) and pencil in dinners for the week. There are apps for your phone that can help with planning, recipe ideas and even websites that will send you the menu each week (based on the sales at your local store (http://www.foodonthetable.com/). Armed with a plan for the week, grocery shopping becomes quick and easy and weekly rather than daily.

The best meals are the ones you already make.  Look at your favorite recipes and pick out the ones that will work the best. Simpler is better for school nights. Using the timer oven, crock pot or microwave, as well as, cooking larger portions to use for two different meals, can save you time and effort. With a plan it only takes a quick check of the menu the night before to remind you of what you need to do to be prepared. This is also very helpful for significant others and teenage children who might not take the initiative to decide on dinner but can follow directions quite well. Asking for help lightens the pressure and makes others feel they are contributing too.

Of course you could do a marathon cooking day and make several meals to freeze or check out the new franchise Dream Dinners where you can make dinners and leave the mess to them. Whatever you decide, having a few things in the freezer already prepared or ready for quick prep can take the struggle out of that dinner hour and leave you with more time to spend with your family.

This is reprinted from our Laine’s Logic Newsletter – Logical Solutions for Today’s Busy Family. Sign up on our website here.

Exercise and Your Child’s Brain

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exercise brainMarch usually marks the middle of the third term of the school year. For some children the winter months are the most challenging. With shorter days and cold, sometimes snowy weather, they are less able to get outside and burn off their extra energy. This makes it difficult for them to “settle down” and get working on their homework.

There is actually a neurobiological reason for this and it has to do with the neurotransmitter chemicals in the brain. I won’t get technical here, but there are three main chemicals in the brain that influence learning. They are serotonin, dopamine and norepinephrine. These chemicals work together to focus, motivate and improve learning in the brain. In his book, Spark, John Ratey, says that exercise improves learning in three ways. I’m paraphrasing but it helps to improve alertness, attention and motivation, helps the cells hold onto new learning and spurs the development of new brain cells. All of which are necessary for new learning and of course for homework.

Here’s how you can help. If you notice that your child is struggling to settle down to do their homework don’t force them. That tends to shut down the brain making it harder to work. Instead, encourage some activity for 15 to 30 minutes. Set a clear time frame so that your child is not surprised that they have to get back to their homework. Provide a five minute and a two minute audio and visual reminder to help with their transition back to homework.

Most middle school students can focus for 30-40 minutes and for elementary age children it is about 15-20 minutes. It’s important to break up your child’s homework time with 5-10 minute activity breaks after a period of focused work. Also providing a snack of lean protein can increase your child’s level of dopamine. Dopamine helps the brain carry the messages from one side to the other. (For children with ADHD, medication helps to increase the level of dopamine allowing the brain to feel “comfortable” and to process the information more efficiently.)

So get your kids active and watch their ability to focus increase and the amount of time they spend on their homework may decrease.

Keeping Your Child's Papers Under Control

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Are you overwhelmed by your child’s papers? The younger they are it seems the more paper they bring home. Depending on the age of your children there are generally three types of children’s papers that come into the home.

LOOK AT: Their school papers that have been corrected and returned, notices

RETURN: The notices and/or items to be signed

KEEP for REFERENCE: The schedules you need to hang onto, contact list for scouts, CCD schedule, etc.

hanging-desk-free-organizerThe LOOK AT group: First you need to decide whether you want to hang it up for a few days, save for posterity or save for now and purge at the end of the term. For this type you can easily use an accordion folder, or a desktop file with fat hanging folders or a hanging file like the one shown. If your child is in middle school or above they should have their own desktop file or a hanging file and should periodically clean out their notebooks and put the papers in a labeled folder for each subject. This way they are all together when it comes time to study for the midterm exams or review for MCAS.

If you just can’t bear to part with some of your child’s art work then leave it displayed for a while and then store in a memory box. At the end of the school year you and your child can enjoy the time going through the papers and picking no more than 10-15 favorites to save.

in boxRETURN: Several clients I have use in/out boxes labeled for each family member. Each child is responsible for emptying their backpack of papers and putting any thing that mom or dad needs to see in their in box. Mom or dad then checks it each day and signs it and puts it in junior’s in box. Then when Junior is getting ready for tomorrow he has to put that signed paper into his backpack and place the backpack near the door.

KEEP for REFERENCE: Sports, Dance and Scout schedules should be entered into your planner and placed on the current month’s family calendar. It is also helpful for your child to enter it into their agenda as well. It helps them plan their long term projects better if they know when they have practice. If there are only a few schedules you may want to make a folder for your desktop file labeled schedules or put each child’s schedule in their folder.

Those Friday papers you get from school often have upcoming event dates. Those should be entered into your planner or electronic calendar as well. You can keep the paper until the event has taken place in a tickler file.

Group contact lists or the season schedule can also be kept in a binder using page protectors. I have created several Family notebooks that hold schedules, the recycle calendar, the library hours, favorite take out restaurant menus and other odds and ends that you need to hold onto but don’t know where to put them. Just make sure that each category is labeled and for a while you might want to put a reminder up that you saved such in such in the family notebook. Keep it easily accessible. You’ll be amazed at how much time it saves you.

If you struggle with your papers, then sign up on our website to receive this month’s Laine’s Logic Newsletter and read, “Paper, Paper Everywhere, but Not the One I Need!”

3 Steps to Solving Your Organizational Challenge

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Happy 7th Anniversary to me! Seven years in business that is. Today starts my eighth year but today is also important for another reason. It is the same day many, many years ago that I decided to get organized. I remember feeling overwhelmed and frustrated and started looking for information. I started devouring anything I could find on getting organized. Back then there was not a lot of information out there. Today, if you Google “get organized” you’ll get 32,800,000 hits in .34 seconds. That’s a lot of information!

The “get organized” business is a lot like the “diet” industry – everyone has their own ideas and they may or may not work for everyone. So how do you decide what to do?

Here are the first three things you should do:

1. Find the root cause. What is it that is really bothering you or causing a problem? Keep asking yourself questions until you can get to the root of the problem. For example, paying a bill late – why does that happen? Is it because the bills are mixed in with the pile of mail and aren’t seen? Or is it that it gets moved from table to counter? It could be, but it’s more than that. Is it because there is no plan of when to pay them? Probably.  The system to handle the bills is missing and needs a few things. So, once the problem is narrowed down you can proceed to step 2.

2. Analyze your options. Figure out all the possible things that might solve the challenges that you discovered in finding the root cause above. Then write down anything and everything you think might have a positive impact in resolving the problem. Then go back and pick two or three things you can do to solve the challenge. To continue with our example, let’s find a home for the mail by using a basket or bin or mail sorter bin, but keep the bills separated by putting them in their own basket. Then decide on what a “bill paying” plan or process might look like. (Do you need a chart to list the bills, or to put a reminder on the to do list? You get the idea.) Analyze your options and decide what changes would have the biggest impact.

3. Try it out. It takes three weeks (sometimes longer) to create a new habit but you should know in a few days whether or not your new solutions are working. You may have to “tweak” it to improve it, but don’t quit if it doesn’t work perfectly the first few weeks. Keep asking, “What can I do to make this work better?” Then try that. Keep trying until you solve it – here’s where you can “Google” to get specific ideas related to what you are trying to change. Using our example, maybe we see that adding “pay bills” to the to do list isn’t helping. Continuing to look for solutions, maybe you try deciding to pay bills every Friday and put that in your planner.  Or maybe you set up all your bills to be paid online through your bank. Whatever you decide, go back to question one and see that it has solved the original problem. If so, then move on to the next challenge.

Just remember to keep it simple. Good luck!

 

2012 Resolutions be Gone!

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2012 motivation without resolutions
2012 motivation without resolutions

Happy New Year! I wish you a year that is all you want it to be. Have you thought about what you would like 2012 to be like? If you reflect back on 2011 as you think about this you may see some things that you want less of. For instance, less stress, less overtime, less excess weight, etc. But instead focus on the positives of what your life would look like and the kind of person you would need to become to have that.

2012 is a brand new year and the opportunity is there for each of us to make it our best year ever. How do you do that? By the choices (ie decisions) you make every moment. You may not even realize you are making a choice because it happens so often throughout the day. But as you start to pay attention, you’ll notice the opportunity to make a wise choice/decision rather than not thinking about it at all. That’s like automatically accepting the “default” setting on your life.

For example, to have less weight, maybe you would need to protect/guard/improve your health. It’s not a resolution I will lose 10 pounds this year, but more of a promise to yourself to protect your health by the choices you make. You would be surprised at the number of opportunities you have throughout the day to “protect your health.” Should I work out, should I take the elevator or the stairs, should I bring my lunch or buy it? Choices you make each and every day that either help or hinder your health.

So, no more resolutions! Instead pick several areas of your life that are important to you and see if you can put them into short phrases that are easy to remember. Then this month focus on the positives, the “wiser” choices you make, and keep track of how you do. I have used Darren Hardy’s Weekly Rhythm Register in the past because you can adapt it to fit your needs. However, this year I am using Joe’s goals so I can keep track on my phone and/or computer. Here are just three of the things I am tracking this year. I will protect my health, respect my boundaries and complete my top five priorities each day. The overriding theme for this year for me is “choices, not excuses!” By tracking those things (and a few more) I feel it will make a difference in my life and also in the kind of person I am. Besides, focusing on what I am doing feels so much better than focusing on what I am not doing.

So, what’s it going to be for you this year? Let me know in the comment box below and let’s get this discussion going.

If you’d like to get tips and strategies for staying on track each month, then sign up for our new monthly newsletter in the sidebar.

5 Things to Do Before You Go to Parent Teacher Conferences

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Parent Teacher conferences; what did you learn about your child?

Most conferences cover the academics, is your child doing well in school? That means can they pass the tests and do they turn in their homework? You also probably learned about your child’s social skills. Are they making friends, being “too social” (talking too much) or getting lost in the crowd?

As a teacher, I loved the opportunity to talk with parents about their children. As a parent I was very intimidated and nervous about those conferences until I understood them and myself better.  If your child is not on an IEP (Individualized Education Plan) or a 504 accommodation plan then you may not interact with your child’s teacher very often (unless there is a problem). So when you arrive at these conferences you may be not be ready for what comes up.

You are part of the team that involves your child, the teacher, the department of education and you. The Department of Elementary and Secondary Education provides the goals that your child needs to attain (they call them standards) at each grade. If your child is not learning these, then their grades will show it. Your teacher is part of that equation, but your child is the other part. Teachers cannot force your child to learn but they can find other ways to make sure that they are getting the skills and knowledge they need. Your job is to make sure that things at home are calm and helpful and that learning and homework are taken seriously. You provide the help when the teacher cannot.

Recommendations for your next parent teacher conference:

  • Review your child’s recent work. Notice any trends, weak areas and strengths so that you can talk about them with your child first and then be prepared to discuss them with the teacher.
  • Talk with your child about how things are going in school. Get specifics about who are his friends, what does he like best about school and what is the least favorite part of school. You may have to advocate for your child as they may not be comfortable advocating for themselves (ex. can’t see the board, can’t hear other student comments, being “bothered” or bullied by a classmate, etc.) so be sure to get details.
  • Keep track of how long your child spends on homework. Ask how the homework is graded (checked off or actually reviewed and graded).
  • If your child struggles with homework, write down some of the strategies you have tried with him or her and be ready to ask for other suggestions from the teacher.
  • Ask about teacher expectations and you will find out what is important to your child’s teacher. If your child meets those expectations, then they will probably get good grades.

Teachers are concerned with how your child is learning when compared to other kids in the class. It often does not concern them if you think your child is not working to their potential as long as they are on par with their peers.

Watch your child study for a test. Do they tend to read and reread the chapter and then do poorly on the test? Or do they really know how to study different subjects using their learning style and strategies that work? If you think your child is working hard and is still not getting the grades then it may be because they haven’t really learned how they learn best. The End Homework Hassle E-Learning Course sends daily emails to your child and organizes, teaches and coaches them through skills and strategies for learning. Help them work smarter and not harder by learning the skills they need to succeed. More information can be found at www.endhomeworkhassle.com

Thanks for reading. As always I welcome your comments below.

Laine

Backpack Do’s and Don’ts

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backpack

The first term is coming to an end in the next week. How is your child/teen doing so far this year? Did they start off strong and then start to slip? Do you find yourself reminding them to do their homework and still find they have “surprise” last minute projects or tests? It can be frustrating, I know. What I have noticed in my work with students is that sometimes parents are “too close” and your voice becomes like Charlie Brown’s mother’s (wahhh wahhh wahhh). Sometimes having your child/teen be accountable to someone else is helpful.

Let’s take a look at your backpack today. First, go get it and take it to the bathroom and weigh it. If it won’t balance on the scale you can weigh yourself without holding it and then with it….and then do the math.

1. Weight of backpack = __B__

2. Your weight x .10 = ___A___

3.  Is B ≥ A?

If the backpack weighs more than 10% of your weight, then try to take out what you don’t need. Some students bring home all their books because they don’t want to check their agendas for the homework they have and bring it all home, just in case.

For example if you weigh 100 pounds, your backpack should weigh 10 pounds or less or you could be hurting your back, neck or shoulders.

Use both straps so the weight is distributed on both shoulders. Allow the backpack to sit just below the back of your waist. Too high and you put a strain on your back, too low and you strain your shoulders. Leave what you don’t need in your locker. Consider having a backup set of books at home. Lighten the load by using one notebook instead of four if possible.

If your bag still weighs more than 10% of your weight, try to remember to stretch out those muscles after carrying it and if they continue to ache, mention it to your parent.

That’s it for today. Now which subject will you do first today?

To your success,

Laine

New Season, New Start: Goal Setting for Autumn

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Happy AutumnHappy Autumn! It is now officially autumn and I can see some of the leaves starting to change color here in the northeast. I love fall but I sometimes feel that it is the shortest season of all. Before you know it the cold temperatures will be here with the excitement (notice I didn’t say stress) of the holiday season.

A new season for me means a new start but also serves as a reminder that the year is coming to an end. In fact there are only 98 days left to the year. Isn’t that scary? The reason I know that is thanks to Gary Ryan Blair who runs a “100 day challenge” program. I love the concept that it is not time to give up but rather time to push harder to get those goals off the list so come January 1st you are proud of what you have accomplished and motivated to keep going.

So, I’m taking a different approach this season. I am not going to go crazy (please hold me to that) by taking on EVERYTHING I want to get done between now and winter. Instead I am going to focus on three goals for October, three for November and maybe one for December. The reason I say three is because you can’t just look at one piece of your life without realizing how everything else is related. For instance, if you have low energy, then you can’t possibly be as effective at work or at home. Coaches may use different names for each category but the basic “parts” of your life can be broken down into categories such as; health, money, career, relationships, fun and recreation, physical environment, family, spiritual and personal growth. So I picked three goals for October in the areas of health, home and business. I know that announcing them publicly is the way to make me more accountable. You will check in on me, won’t you?

Here are my SMART (specific, measurable, attainable, realistic, and time specific) goals:

1. Health: I will work out or be physically active three or more days a week for 30 minutes or more for the month of October.

2. Home: I will redo my son’s room by the end of October.

3. Business: I will keep track of the hours I work and separate “work” from “my time” throughout October.

There! Now I am committed to those three goals. I deliberately made them easy to do so that I could be successful without killing myself. If I had said I will work out 5 or 6 days a week for 45-60 minutes, then once I failed, I wouldn’t want to keep going. So, make your goals not so tough that life events could cause you to fail, but also not so easy that you aren’t stretching yourself.

Now please use the comment box below to share your October goals (I’m giving you the last week of September to get ready) and let’s hold each other accountable.

If you’d like me to hold your son or daughter accountable for staying organized with their homework, then check out my End Homework Hassle E-Learning Course.

Thanks,

Laine

Back to School Euphoria Meets Reality

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Are you frustrated yet?
Are you frustrated yet?

Are you frustrated yet? It is only week two for many of you but I am already hearing about the homework hassles. The first couple of days the kids came home and got right to their homework. Then as the week went by that back to school euphoria seemed to fade and the struggle began.

The kids slipped back into their routine and you probably slipped back into yours. Is this how you want it to be this year? If so, then keep on following Einstein’s definition of insanity that says, “Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”

If you have had enough and are ready to seriously make some changes, then now is the time.  It is not too late to take a look at what is happening at home during homework time and figure out ways to “fix” it. Talk with your child; they are almost certainly just as unhappy as you are. They may feel powerless to do anything about it, but together you might be able to come up with some ideas that will take some of the pressure off.

Here are a few things to get you started:

1. Timing? If your child is doing homework after the time they should be in bed then start right in within 30 minutes of them getting home don’t wait until after dinner to start. Chunk homework into sessions of about 30 minutes of work with a 5 minute break.

2. Environment? Do you put all the kids at the kitchen table so you can keep an eye on them while they work? Some kids need quiet, some need to work on the floor, and some just like to be close enough to hear others around. What does your child prefer?

3. Motivation? What is in it for your child? Rewards for great report cards are often too far away to provide any real motivation. Kids want things now. So what is it they can do when their homework is finished? Go to bed? For some of us, that would make us happy, but kids want to play. Make sure each day there is time for them to play and relax and do what makes them happy. If they have something to look forward to, they may be more motivated to get their “work” done first so they can enjoy their reward.

If you have found these tips to be helpful and would like to have someone else remind your child to do their homework, clean out their backpack, or start that long term project today then check out our E-Learning program that sends a daily email to teach, organize and coach your child to a successful year. What are you waiting for?