Holidays

A Calmer Holiday Season Starts Here

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Self-care by the fireHow do you feel about the holidays? If it is a mix of excitement and overwhelm, then you are not alone. The season can feel like sensory overload, with unlimited choices and decisions, an extended “to-do” list and a short time frame in which to get it all done. However, we know that stress doesn’t help get things done any faster, it just takes a bigger toll on us. Here are some ideas to help you keep the stress level down and have a meaningful and memorable holiday season.

Self-Care Ideas:

  • You don’t need to do it all. Pick the things that resonate with you rather than feeling obligated to accept all invitations.
  • Find your high energy times and use them to get the important things done
  • Most adults can focus for 90 minutes but then you should take a break and do something that involves more activity
  • Start your morning off knowing what your top 3 priorities are for the day. If you wait to plan your day in the morning, you are already wasting valuable energy time.
  • What is it that stresses you out the most about the holidays? Can you brainstorm with your family some solutions or strategies to help, rather than avoiding it?
  • Remember experiences together can be more meaningful than “things”
  • Take breaks throughout the day to check in with yourself. We often ignore our internal signals until they become urgent. (Ex. Are you hungry, tired, overwhelmed, or need support?) Ask, “What do I need right now?”
  • A 15-minute walk in nature is helpful for resetting your brain and attitude – give it a try.
  • Find little things that add joy to your day and sprinkle them throughout

Lastly, remember to take pictures and to write down the good, the bad and the ugly so you don’t forget what made this holiday so memorable. I’m building my “one sheet” option in Notion that covers everything from gift suggestions, to special events that happen each year and important things to remember and/or do for next year, recipe successes or fails, and most importantly how I felt this year. How will you remember?

I’ve been summarizing our Christmases for years in my journal and it has helped incredibly to reread them each December 1st, but this page in Notion includes the specifics (you can use a notebook if you prefer) and that will ensure that each year is less stressful and more fun.

Wishing you a calm, magical and fun-filled holiday season no matter what holidays you celebrate.

 

Are You on Santa’s Stressed List?

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Santa's Stessed ListStress. It’s a word we hear every day and I am sure it means different things to each of us (including our kids). The World Health Organization defines stress as, “a state of worry or mental tension caused by a difficult situation. It is a natural human response that prompts us to address challenges and threats to our lives.”  Back in the “early” days, stress was meant to protect us from the dangers out in the world and keep us safe. These days it feels more like a byproduct of our everyday lives. Even the general pace of our society can sometimes (no, probably often at this time of year) feel like it is going too fast for us to process and is one stressful event after another.

Just to be clear, I am talking about the stress we bring on ourselves – the temporary type* that can often be mitigated if we had the ability for “do-overs.” Think about the last time you stopped and realized you were feeling overly stressed. What happened just before that?

Common Stressors:

      • Did you say, “yes” to one or ten more things you knew you didn’t have time for?
      • Or did you forget something important and then had to scramble to make it right?
      • Did you lose something important?
      • Were you late for an appointment?
      • Did you stay up later than you knew you should?

All of these, and many more can increase your stress level. Imagine if you could rewind time and try again. Would you be able to identify what got in the way and caused your stress and then be able to prevent it (or at least reduce its impact)? What would that feel like?

Now figure out what you can do to get that feeling.

What ideas did you come up with? I know you are in the mad, almost the holidays rush but, maybe you can make some notes for next year.  Trust me, your “future self” will thank you if you leave some hints and actions to take to manage your stress level.

Here are some ideas to think about:

      • Get more sleep (dark rooms, lowering lights in the evening and using lamps not overheads)
      • Exercise
      • Build a self-care toolbox of things that help recharge you and schedule time in for you
      • Create routines that work for you and the family
      • Limit changes to plans at the last minute – it is okay to say “no”
      • Feeling prepared helps melt stress so make a realistic plan and then work it
      • Smart tech use – sure the dopamine hit feels good at the time but then that time is gone
      • No negative self-talk – your brain believes what it hears
      • Declutter the things you no longer need and that only interfere with you being able to find what you need quickly
      • Lastly, organize your spaces. Where is the logical spot for that? Where would a hook work for your keys? What would make your life easier and save you time? Add that to your to do list.

When you understand you have options, you can take action. Even baby steps in the right direction, will still get you there.

What Brings Out the Magic For You?

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Not sure how it happens, but once December hits, you can feel the increased tension in the air and see it all around. I do my best to stay positive and keep my Christmas spirit up. However, some people seem to forget there are other people around them and that increased tension seems to shut down their brains Not you readers! 😊

So, this year, I am taking a hint from Cas at Clutterbug, to make a list of things that make me happy at this time of year. She called it a bucket list, but I am calling it a menu. On a menu, I can pick and choose my options and there is no competition to “eat it all.” As Cas mentions, it is easy to get “distracted” by the hustle and bustle and the list of to-dos.  That is when we miss out on the “magical” moments that the season has to offer. So, this year, let’s make a menu of the simple, no fuss things that bring us joy and then include something each day that makes us smile.

Here’s a few of my ideas to get you started. You already know the kinds of things that bring a smile to your face, so it should be easy for you to make your own list. Just be sure to add something that brings the magic to your day. Get your family involved too – everyone needs more magic.

Magic Moment Menu

      • Have a cup of hot chocolate with marshmallows (spiced cider or peppermint tea, whatever you like best)
      • Drive around your town to check out the lights
      • Bake cookies in fun shapes or a gingerbread house
      • Cas’ suggestion: “do something kind for a stranger”
      • Watch Hallmark
      • If there is snow, build a snow something….(we’ve made a dragon, giant turtle, reindeer and Santa, in the past)
      • Take a walk in the woods (even better if there is some snow)
      • Read a holiday story
      • Play Christmas charades or trivia with the kids
      • Sit in the dark with only the Christmas tree on and breathe

You get the idea. Take some time to breathe and take in the magic of this time of year. It all gets done, you know it always works out, so why not take time to enjoy those little moments. They add up to some great memories.

Wishing you all the magic of this time of year no matter what holiday you celebrate.

Finding the Magic

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Magic, to me, is that unexpected, out of the ordinary happening that brings forth surprising emotions of joy and delight. Sometimes we can get so caught up with what is happening in the world that we don’t notice the magic that is all around us. This month, the most magical month of the year, we may need to look closer for it, create it on our own and take time to appreciate it more.

The holidays have always had a certain magic to them. You can see it in the eyes of children, feel it in the air and notice it in the kindness of people around you. I’m not talking the “magic” of turning down an unexpected aisle to find a display of toilet paper or paper towels although that does bring a sense of wonder. I’m talking about letting go of the stresses that we have no control over and focusing on what we can control.

There’s magic in the holiday celebrations and traditions that your family keeps. It’s in the decorating, the baking, the games you play and the things you do together. Some things may need to change this year, but you can decide on what and how. Are there new traditions you want to start?  Need to reaffirm some of the old traditions? It is up to you and your family. Do those things that “spark joy” as Marie Kondo would say and do them with enthusiasm and drop the things that don’t.

There’s magic in the family connections. Seeing your kids close up without the hustle and bustle of going here and there may help you “see” them more closely. Maybe you’ve seen how they persevere with school work that is not easy – how dedicated they are to their homework and how resilient they are as they adapt to the changes that keep happening. Or maybe you have watched them struggle and see where they need help. You can secretly help by playing games together that build on those weak skills or by baking or creating things together. Encourage their interests and help them connect with their friends (in a safe way) and focus on the positives (ratio of 5:1 positives to outweigh one negative). Value the relationship above homework.

Magic can be found in the friendships that have prevailed during these days. The connections that have grown and continue to feed your soul even though you may be separated by distance.

Maybe you’re finding magic in remembering what it is like to cook/bake. Making something with your hands be it baking, sewing, building or creating – following your heart to find your passion or a hobby that excites you and appreciating the everyday things you might normally take for granted. It feels good and there is magic in that.

There’s magic in giving. Giving of yourself, your time or your resources. Maybe it’s a toy drive donation, or a pair of gloves for Cradles to Crayons via Amazon, food for the food pantry or picking up groceries for your neighbor that can’t get out. Volunteering or helping those around you whether you get to see the smile on a child’s face or not, you know you “did good.”

As a certified organizer coach, I have to also mention the magic in an organized home. Maybe it is in the taking care of those things you have tolerated for so long but now could be solved with a simple solution like a well-placed hook or container. Move those things you rarely use so that the everyday items are front and center. That feeling that you can actually find what you are looking for, and know that nothing important has slipped through the cracks, can save you time and stress. The magic in decluttering opens up your life for new possibilities when you are not struggling to keep up with the daily “grind” or wasting time searching. Create some habits and routines that will keep the whole family organized and less stressed and relax into that magic.

Lastly, there is magic in the new year. Life is short and unpredictable as 2020 has taught us so let’s do what is important and meaningful. Find the magic in the little things and begin the year filled with hope. Wishing you a healthy, safe new year filled with love, hope and magic. Welcome 2021!