homework

Homework Coach or Enforcer?

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frustrated over homeworkIs homework a battle in your home? If you find that it has become a nightly battle or that your child or teen has lost interest in school; then it may be time to try a different approach. I will admit I sympathize with teens trying to become independent when often the adults around them are inadvertently taking away their sense of control. If you find that you are constantly asking them if their homework is done or suggesting ways for them to get it done then here are five tips to take you from homework enforcer to homework coach. Remember the role of a good coach is to encourage problem solving skills, develop independence and provide support when needed.

          • The first and most important step is to realize whether or not you are enabling your child/teen to feel helpless. If you are constantly reminding them to do their homework, get ready for school, pack their backpack, or go to bed why would they need to remember? The same thing applies if you are solving their problems for them or designing their notebook your way. All of these things take the pressure off of your teen and puts it on you. You’ll need to work together to figure out how much your teen can do independently and what he or she might need a little support for. I know it is often easier to keep track of it yourself, but teaching your teen to problem solve, keep track of assignments and get their work done independently are all skills they need to develop for a successful life.
          • Ask questions that begin with the word, “what” rather than “did” or “is”. Questions that require a simple yes or no answer will only get you the one word answer. Ask a question that requires them to answer in a sentence that gives you some real information. For example, “What homework do you have left to do?” This sounds less judgmental and requires more than a one word answer to reply. Good coaches ask higher level questions that need explanations, rather than simple one word replies.
          • Start with the end in mind, is a term that Stephen Covey used but is helpful for those having trouble with completing homework. Help your child visualize what that assignment or project looks like when it is completed. Then you can guide them to work backwards to include all the steps necessary to get it to that point. You can also help “backwards plan” long term projects with specific dates to work on the pieces of the project. If necessary, create the plan together and then have certain check ins rather than always asking if it is done.
          • Discuss with your child/teen what kind of an environment is best for them to work in. Do they like it quiet and away from the rest of the family or do they like to be where the action is? Many younger students don’t like to be alone in their rooms, for them it is easier to work in the kitchen or close by. Use a trifold foam board to create a distraction free zone and keep the TV and radio off and let them use their own music with ear buds. I have read that music can “satisfy” the hungry ADHD brain by providing enough stimulation to help it relax. This is done by listening to the same playlist every day during homework time. It is not picking each song but pressing play once and letting the same music play lightly in the background for about 30-45 minutes. That is long enough to get some work done. Have them take a short break and then get back to their homework and play that list of songs again.
          • Make sure your children have some “down” time. Everyone is entitled to relax after a long day. In fact, research says that having some down time after working, helps the brain to process what was just learned. Many students are not getting the 8-9 hours of sleep they need to do their best. Those with ADHD will benefit from designing a “routine” for sleep. Start with shutting down electronics at least 30 minutes before bed (the blue light stimulates serotonin the wake up hormone), dim the lights (good for increasing melatonin the sleep hormone) and relax. Add in the other bedtime get ready tasks and aim to have them in bed around the same time each night. Aim for at least 8 hours but 9 is ideal.

Parents, you are your child/teen’s life line.They may continue to need your support throughout school but as they enter middle and high school, it is time for them to develop their problem solving skills. That means they don’t need you to solve their problems or challenges for them but to work with them to come up with solutions together. Stay calm. When stressed, cortisol, the stress hormone, is released into the body and it can literally shut down the brain making it nearly impossible to think. Students cannot force their stressed brain to think at that point and it is best to take a break and go do something active. Exercise increases the level of dopamine and other neurotransmitters (good chemicals) in the brain that can help get them back on track. If the situation gets too stressful, it is best to just walk away. Homework is homework….let the teacher deal with it.

Thanks for reading,

Laine

Stuck? 12 Ways to Encourage Cognitive Flexibility

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cognitive flexibility brainThe best way to describe the executive function of cognitive flexibility is to think of Einstein’s definition of insanity. “Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” That would be cognitive inflexibility. Cognitive flexibility is the ability to notice when your thinking process is not working or to notice when changes have occurred and to be flexible enough to adapt the thought process and to think differently about it. It may be that the goal of the project changed, something in the environment has changed, or the next step cannot be completed due to outside forces and thus the individual becomes stuck and can’t continue.

On the Behavioral Inventory of Executive Functions (BRIEF) there are two categories that relate to this skill; cognitive shift and behavioral shift. Together they can indicate a student’s ability to try different approaches to something whether it is in their thinking or in actually changing their behavior when they notice it is not working. Solving a math problem is a good example of this. The student knows what the answer should be and solves the problem. When the answer is not right, they erase it and try again. Often they are repeating the same mistakes without realizing it.

In students:

  • Stuck on a math problem but not realizing they are doing the same thing and are surprised the answer isn’t different.
  • Difficulty adjusting to changes in plans
  • Projects have various parts to them and when students get stuck on one piece they are unable to move forward.
  • Creative writing is a real challenge as they cannot generate new ideas as they get stuck in one frame of thought.

In adults:

  • Following processes that aren’t effective because “I’ve always done it this way.”
  • Easily “thrown off course” when conditions change
  • Difficulty providing multiple solutions or ideas or in synthesizing something new out of given information

Strategies:

  1. Give advance notice of changes with visual and/or verbal reminders (timers too)
  2. When stuck or when you see the frustration start to build, suggest a break to do something active
  3. Leave yourself a note explaining where you left off, so when you return you can pick it back up quickly
  4. Encourage brainstorming and generating multiple ideas before settling on a specific approach
  5. Start with the end in mind and work backwards
  6. Ask for help, Google it or use a website like www.khanacademy.org
  7. Use a whiteboard and don’t erase the previous approach
  8. Use stories of past successful approaches to remind them of other options/approaches
  9. Create a mind map (using colors and different shapes for key ideas)
  10. Have a backwards day where everything is done backwards
  11. Write down the approaches tried and list other options or give choices
  12. If they play video games, you can get them to explain the different strategies they used to advance to the next level and compare that to their school work

Helping your child brainstorm and learn ways to become more flexible in their thinking will help them become better problem solvers, creative thinkers and successful students. The world is not predictable and we all need to learn to adapt to the changes it may throw at us so that it doesn’t throw us off course.

 

What DID I Come in Here For?

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Have you ever walked into a room and forgotten what you went in there for? Or sent your child to do two things and they only did one? If this kind of thing happens often then it may be a working memory issue.

Working Memory is an Executive Function skill that plays an important role in remembering what to do and how to do it.  It can have an impact on how much you and your child get done and how quickly and/or completely. Peg Dawson and Richard Guare1 define working memory as, “the ability to hold information in mind while performing complex tasks. It incorporates the ability to draw on past learning or experience to apply to the situation at hand or to project into the future.” This explains why your child can do the homework one night and the next night not have any idea. It also explains why things are left unfinished, or multiple step directions are not followed and why they do the same thing over and over even though they “know” or should know that it is wrong. It also interferes with learning from past mistakes. Multitasking or being distracted and not paying attention to details can also have an effect on your ability to use your working memory effectively.

In Children it may look like:

  • Difficulty following multi step directions (or forgets some but not all of the steps during a project)
  • Struggles with math, especially processes of more than two or three steps (ex. long division).
  • Struggles to get out the door in the morning or to remember the steps in a routine
  • May “get in trouble” for the same thing over and over
  • Really studies but fails the test

In adults:

  • Walk into a room and forget why
  • These are the people that forget they are driving when they are on their cellphone
  • Leave tasks in midstream
  • Wake up in the middle of the night remembering something they forgot to do
  • Get home from the store without the item they went for

Strategies to help working memory:

  • Write it down! Use a planner, smartphone app (Google Calendar, Color note, Evernote, Remember the Milk, Hiveminder, etc.), or notepad to keep track
  • Make it multisensory whenever possible
  • Simplify and slow down. (Multitasking reduces your IQ by 10-20 points, so use your full capacity)
  • Visualize the “end” – what will it look like when I am done/ready?
  • Cut out distractions and focus on the task at hand
  • Visual cues like using your fingers as placeholders for what you need to remember (3 things=3 fingers) and “don’t forget” lists on the back of the door.
  • Chore cards (Russell Barkley’s idea) that list the steps involved in a chore
  • Repeat out loud what you want to remember
  • Have your child repeat back what they need to do
  • Do one thing at a time until you or your child can handle more
  • Use mnemonics, acronyms or make up silly songs to remember what to do
  • Templates, checklists and pictures for processes, chores, and routines

For Learning:

  • Graphic organizers and mind maps using color, shape, and placement help the brain recall
  • Preview before reading
  • Use outlines, take notes and use highlighters when possible (different color for each step in directions)
  • Have a note buddy to share notes with your child or to call if they forget what to do
  • Write out the steps first so you can check back to see they are all done
  • Templates, checklists and pictures for processes, chores, and routines (long division, morning get ready routine, what to take to school, etc.)
  • Play games that rely on remembering to build working memory

Once you become aware of what is preventing you from remembering or can find a few strategies that will work to help you compensate for a weak working memory you can then help your child learn about what is getting in his or her way. Use reflective listening that shows you “hear” them and guide them to figure out their own solutions, don’t provide them for them. Lots of people have working memory challenges and part of it is just how the world is today. For example, the media is constantly trying to redirect our attention with what is now termed “interrupt marketing” like the pop ups on the bottom of your TV screen during a show. It is annoying and it takes determination to not let outside influences interfere with your ability to remember. So, find what works for you and help your child find what works for them.

If you care to share your favorite strategy, I’d love to hear.

1 Executive Skills in Children and Adolescents by Peg Dawson and Richard Guare (2010)

Also recommend: Late, Lost and Unprepared by Joyce Cooper-Kahn and Laurie Dietzel, and Smart but Scattered also by Peg Dawson and Richare Guare.

What to Do When You’re Stuck in the Mud with a Fried Brain

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fried brainThe pressure of homework or rather the pressure of finishing homework for that valuable checkmark is taking away from the point of homework. It used to be that homework was a review of what was learned in school that day, but now often times students are “re”teaching themselves because teachers do not allow enough time for students to process new information.

When students get really focused or feel pressured to get their homework done it is almost like they put blinders on. They are no longer really learning the material they are just trying to get through the assignment. I want to give them credit for persevering but also want them to know that at some point they become less effective and should stop. How many times have you seen your child do a math problem over and over again expecting a different answer? Middle and High School students often have the answer to the math problem and their job is to set up the equation and get that answer. Lots of things can go wrong in this process (calculation error, wrong sign, solved in the wrong order, wrong equation, etc.) but students tend to erase and start again – exactly the same way.

This is called cognitive inflexibility. It happens in kids, teens and adults and is the inability to switch your approach or your thinking to problem solving when what you are doing isn’t working or something changes. It is like getting stuck in mud and not even realizing it. So in the above example, they erase the problem and because they are not 100% tuned in, they could be repeating the same process or same error over again. This can go on and on and that makes homework take longer and longer. Talk to your student about this at a time when they are not stressed about homework and print out the four steps below for them. Help them add to the list.

What to do when you are stuck on your homework:

1. Stop and take a look at what you have done. Check for errors or misunderstandings. If you don’t see anything then go to number 2.

2. Take a non-electronic break (5-15 minutes) and let your subconscious mind work on it and then go back and try it one more time.

3. Stop erasing and use a whiteboard after the first attempt so you can see all of your answers. What is happening?

4. Brainstorm other things you can do. For example you could: Skip it and come back to it, call or text a friend in your class, go back to the text book and reread key information, check your class notes, go in early or stay late for extra help, Google it or use a website like www.khanacademy.org to help.

For whatever reason, students seem to think that they “shouldn’t” use other resources to help them solve a problem. When this happens, they often end up wasting so much time trying to figure things out when a simple search or call to a friend could solve that quickly.

Motivation Holds the Key – For Students

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motivation

Motivation is that hidden power that gets you to do something that you might not have otherwise wanted to do. It has been defined as an “incentive, drive or desire to do.” It is the inspiration that pushes you to score that goal, or ace that test. It can help you keep at something when you would prefer to quit.

Now I know that it can be difficult to motivate yourself when it comes to school stuff. I get that. But without understanding the “why” behind what you are doing, you may never find that extra motivation to get you through the tough times.

They say there are two types of motivation, extrinsic and intrinsic. Some people are motivated by external or extrinsic rewards – things that can be bought or received (games, toys, $). Others are motivated by internal or intrinsic rewards. Intrinsic motivation is like the special feeling an “A” brings, or that feeling of pride in yourself when you make the honor roll. I think there are two other types of motivation – pain and pleasure. For those that are motivated by pain, they work harder to avoid the “pain” (getting grounded or losing the computer). Those motivated by pleasure are motivated to get things done in order to be rewarded like extra time with friends, or staying up later. So, once you know which motivates you, you can create options for increasing your own motivation.

Today I’d like you to think about what motivates you. What gives you that extra energy or incentive to push harder when you really don’t want to? Is it extrinsic, intrinsic, pain or pleasure motivated? Why are you working hard to get good grades and what helps push you to work your best? Share with your parents and get them on your team. You are half way through the school year… knowing this and using it, can help you through the rest of the year.

What is your key to motivating yourself? Finding your “why” and making it important. That will help you push through when the homework or the studying gets tough because you have a reason that is important to you. You have found what motivates you.

Motivation holds the key!

It's About TIME

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time-timerIt is almost time for getting back to school. If last year was a struggle, it was probably about that four letter word…T I M E.

Does your child have the same perception/understanding about time that you do? If you feel that you are often encouraging them to “hurry up” or if they sometimes miss the bus or stay up late completing a project then you might want to try this experiment. Gather the family and a stop watch. Ask the children to close their eyes and not open them until they feel a minute of time has passed. Each individual will guess differently. Now have them time you. Is their sense of a minute longer or shorter than yours? Are you thinking it has been a minute when it has only been 30 seconds? Sometimes children haven’t developed that internal sense of the passing of time. Sometimes adults are in such a state of “rush” that they lose that sense of time. Using analog clocks and visual timers like a time timer can help develop that internal sense.

Next thing to figure out is how much time is available and what is it being used for? I suggest having your child keep track of his time on a time log. It is a great way to see where the time is going. Is there enough time for homework or are after school activities cutting that short? Sometimes, kids are doing the best they can but they are so exhausted from other activities, that homework only gets the minimum amount of effort. Other times they are just wasting the time or are multitasking between homework and Face Book.

So, is there enough time for the homework? Check the planner. If the student is using it, they should begin to estimate the amount of time each subject will take them. Add up those estimates and decide if there REALLY is enough time.

There are two drawbacks to a paper planner. Assignments are usually written in on the day they are given and not on the day they are due. So, if a project or test is due a week away, there is no reminder once the planner page has been turned. Secondly, a planner doesn’t provide the big picture view of what is due. Many students are using the calendar feature on their iPod touch or Google calendar to keep track of assignments and also to set reminders. Electronic reminders don’t forget and… kids don’t see them as “nagging” either.

Printing out the calendar view or writing all assignments on a monthly calendar helps to give the big picture view of what is coming up. Be sure to write in all activities and appointments so that students know exactly how much time they have to get homework done. The big picture also helps them see how many days they will need to work on a long term project.  It allows them to add in small blocks of studying over several days to prep for a test. This has been shown to be more effective than cramming the night before. Using these strategies will help your child begin to understand that time can’t be stretched and if they want to have free time to themselves, they need to use the time they have efficiently.

If you’d like to stop “reminding” your child about homework every day and begin to build independence then check out our daily email program called end homework hassle. Each day a new strategy or skill is sent to your child through email. You get a weekly update of the content so you can support them as they go.

Student Strategy: Five Things Your Child's Desk or Study Area Needs

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student-at-desk

A child’s study area should be comfortable for them and “fit” them. That means their feet should touch the floor (or a stool) and the chair should be high enough for their elbows to rest on the desk at an almost 90 degree angle.The following five things will also help them be more efficient and maybe even get their homework done sooner.

1. Good lighting is the number one thing your child needs in this area. The light should be white and not yellow and not buzz. It should be positioned over the desk area and not on the ceiling as the light will be behind your child’s head, casting a shadow. A good light can prevent eye strain.

2. A large desk or counter space where your child can spread out a book and a notebook without having to stack them. It is difficult to read and write when you have to keep moving things around.

3. Supplies should be within arm’s reach. The important things like a highlighter, ruler, pens, pencils, eraser, stapler, notebook paper, three hole punch, sticky notes, scissors and post it flags should all be nearby. If you child has to get up to get something then it may take up to 15 minutes to get his brain back into the kind of focus he had before he got up. A large trash can is also essential.

4. Calendar of the current month to use to plan out long term projects, keep track of upcoming tests, appointments and sports schedules. Having a month to look at provides a better picture of what is coming up so they can see what is important. Having the term ending dates and the progress report dates and no school days is also helpful.

5. Files for each subject or one giant one for the year is helpful (depending on the grade level) to keep tests and quizzes and last term’s notes to use as a study guide. Often times when kid’s clean out their backpacks they throw away anything that is not that night’s homework. This is a big mistake! Those tests and quizzes should be reviewed and corrected to be sure your child is not misunderstanding a major concept that could show up later. Older students need to save them for midterms and finals. You, the parent, may want to save them so that the term grade is not a surprise to you either.

Reprinted from our March newsletter. Sign up here. Need help getting your child through the last term of the school year? Come join us tonight at the Hingham Library at 7pm for strategies to help.

Exercise and Your Child’s Brain

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exercise brainMarch usually marks the middle of the third term of the school year. For some children the winter months are the most challenging. With shorter days and cold, sometimes snowy weather, they are less able to get outside and burn off their extra energy. This makes it difficult for them to “settle down” and get working on their homework.

There is actually a neurobiological reason for this and it has to do with the neurotransmitter chemicals in the brain. I won’t get technical here, but there are three main chemicals in the brain that influence learning. They are serotonin, dopamine and norepinephrine. These chemicals work together to focus, motivate and improve learning in the brain. In his book, Spark, John Ratey, says that exercise improves learning in three ways. I’m paraphrasing but it helps to improve alertness, attention and motivation, helps the cells hold onto new learning and spurs the development of new brain cells. All of which are necessary for new learning and of course for homework.

Here’s how you can help. If you notice that your child is struggling to settle down to do their homework don’t force them. That tends to shut down the brain making it harder to work. Instead, encourage some activity for 15 to 30 minutes. Set a clear time frame so that your child is not surprised that they have to get back to their homework. Provide a five minute and a two minute audio and visual reminder to help with their transition back to homework.

Most middle school students can focus for 30-40 minutes and for elementary age children it is about 15-20 minutes. It’s important to break up your child’s homework time with 5-10 minute activity breaks after a period of focused work. Also providing a snack of lean protein can increase your child’s level of dopamine. Dopamine helps the brain carry the messages from one side to the other. (For children with ADHD, medication helps to increase the level of dopamine allowing the brain to feel “comfortable” and to process the information more efficiently.)

So get your kids active and watch their ability to focus increase and the amount of time they spend on their homework may decrease.

5 Things to Do Before You Go to Parent Teacher Conferences

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Parent Teacher conferences; what did you learn about your child?

Most conferences cover the academics, is your child doing well in school? That means can they pass the tests and do they turn in their homework? You also probably learned about your child’s social skills. Are they making friends, being “too social” (talking too much) or getting lost in the crowd?

As a teacher, I loved the opportunity to talk with parents about their children. As a parent I was very intimidated and nervous about those conferences until I understood them and myself better.  If your child is not on an IEP (Individualized Education Plan) or a 504 accommodation plan then you may not interact with your child’s teacher very often (unless there is a problem). So when you arrive at these conferences you may be not be ready for what comes up.

You are part of the team that involves your child, the teacher, the department of education and you. The Department of Elementary and Secondary Education provides the goals that your child needs to attain (they call them standards) at each grade. If your child is not learning these, then their grades will show it. Your teacher is part of that equation, but your child is the other part. Teachers cannot force your child to learn but they can find other ways to make sure that they are getting the skills and knowledge they need. Your job is to make sure that things at home are calm and helpful and that learning and homework are taken seriously. You provide the help when the teacher cannot.

Recommendations for your next parent teacher conference:

  • Review your child’s recent work. Notice any trends, weak areas and strengths so that you can talk about them with your child first and then be prepared to discuss them with the teacher.
  • Talk with your child about how things are going in school. Get specifics about who are his friends, what does he like best about school and what is the least favorite part of school. You may have to advocate for your child as they may not be comfortable advocating for themselves (ex. can’t see the board, can’t hear other student comments, being “bothered” or bullied by a classmate, etc.) so be sure to get details.
  • Keep track of how long your child spends on homework. Ask how the homework is graded (checked off or actually reviewed and graded).
  • If your child struggles with homework, write down some of the strategies you have tried with him or her and be ready to ask for other suggestions from the teacher.
  • Ask about teacher expectations and you will find out what is important to your child’s teacher. If your child meets those expectations, then they will probably get good grades.

Teachers are concerned with how your child is learning when compared to other kids in the class. It often does not concern them if you think your child is not working to their potential as long as they are on par with their peers.

Watch your child study for a test. Do they tend to read and reread the chapter and then do poorly on the test? Or do they really know how to study different subjects using their learning style and strategies that work? If you think your child is working hard and is still not getting the grades then it may be because they haven’t really learned how they learn best. The End Homework Hassle E-Learning Course sends daily emails to your child and organizes, teaches and coaches them through skills and strategies for learning. Help them work smarter and not harder by learning the skills they need to succeed. More information can be found at www.endhomeworkhassle.com

Thanks for reading. As always I welcome your comments below.

Laine

Back to School Euphoria Meets Reality

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Are you frustrated yet?
Are you frustrated yet?

Are you frustrated yet? It is only week two for many of you but I am already hearing about the homework hassles. The first couple of days the kids came home and got right to their homework. Then as the week went by that back to school euphoria seemed to fade and the struggle began.

The kids slipped back into their routine and you probably slipped back into yours. Is this how you want it to be this year? If so, then keep on following Einstein’s definition of insanity that says, “Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”

If you have had enough and are ready to seriously make some changes, then now is the time.  It is not too late to take a look at what is happening at home during homework time and figure out ways to “fix” it. Talk with your child; they are almost certainly just as unhappy as you are. They may feel powerless to do anything about it, but together you might be able to come up with some ideas that will take some of the pressure off.

Here are a few things to get you started:

1. Timing? If your child is doing homework after the time they should be in bed then start right in within 30 minutes of them getting home don’t wait until after dinner to start. Chunk homework into sessions of about 30 minutes of work with a 5 minute break.

2. Environment? Do you put all the kids at the kitchen table so you can keep an eye on them while they work? Some kids need quiet, some need to work on the floor, and some just like to be close enough to hear others around. What does your child prefer?

3. Motivation? What is in it for your child? Rewards for great report cards are often too far away to provide any real motivation. Kids want things now. So what is it they can do when their homework is finished? Go to bed? For some of us, that would make us happy, but kids want to play. Make sure each day there is time for them to play and relax and do what makes them happy. If they have something to look forward to, they may be more motivated to get their “work” done first so they can enjoy their reward.

If you have found these tips to be helpful and would like to have someone else remind your child to do their homework, clean out their backpack, or start that long term project today then check out our E-Learning program that sends a daily email to teach, organize and coach your child to a successful year. What are you waiting for?