Laine

What Your Child/Teen Wants You to Know about ADHD

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ADHD helpHey Mom/Dad (or Parent),

We are about to start a new school year and I am worried and scared that it will be like last year. I really do want to do well, but my ADHD keeps getting in the way and I don’t know what to do about it.

I do know that I get very upset when you raise your voice (yell) at me or ask me things like, “why didn’t you…” and then my brain just shuts down. I want you to be proud of me but, when your voice is loud or you use a different tone of voice, it makes me think you are mad at me. Could we celebrate my successes more and not focus so much on my grades because I am doing my best?

I know I forget things but reminding me a hundred times doesn’t help me remember. In fact, each time you interrupt me while I am doing my homework, it adds 15-20 more minutes for me to refocus on what I was doing. No wonder I finish my homework right before bedtime. I’d like to have some free time before bed to relax and chill out. Maybe that way I would be able to fall asleep faster and feel better in the morning.

How about we don’t talk about homework when I get home and instead let me have a snack, as I am having lunch very early and then I can to outside, or relax, and recharge a bit before starting homework. Then after about a ½ hour (say 4pm) I will start on my homework. Don’t ask me what I have for homework if I don’t have my agenda open in front of me. That’s why I write it down – so I don’t have to remember it. No interruptions please! I will take short breaks so if you have something to ask me, please wait until then.

I would appreciate it if every week you would tell me what appointments or after school activities I have, so I can put them in my agenda/planner. I don’t like surprises or changes in plans! And I don’t want to have something EVERY day after school. I need time to myself, to do what makes me happy so I can recharge.

I like to be able to predict what comes next, so if you can help me figure out a good bedtime and wake up time so I have time to do everything I need to without missing the bus, that would be helpful. (Use an alarm clock, not a phone.) If you help me make it a habit, then you won’t have to remind me of every step I need to do. That would be a relief! I can sometimes still hear your voice telling me what to do when I am on the bus.

Also, can we get all the clothes that no longer fit me, out of my dresser? It is so hard to find what I want to wear. I need fewer options and I need to figure out what to wear, the night before. My room needs help too. It is always so messy that I can’t work at my desk. What can we do to make it work better?

As for my homework….I don’t need you to check it for accuracy because that is my teacher’s job. I don’t need the answers either, but sometimes I just cannot understand the directions, or I have forgotten how to do it, or it is just too boring or complicated. Encourage me to think of other resources I can use to find the answers or help me break it down into more manageable pieces.

Let’s use technology where it can help me with reminders and alarms but save the gaming stuff for after my work is done. You know how easily I can get distracted:-p

Please tell me later if I said or did something that upset my friend as sometimes, I have no clue what he meant by what he said or how his face looked. Friendships are hard, but really important to me. I want to be a good friend.

Please be patient with me as I learn new skills. My teacher says that my brain isn’t fully developed yet and that I might need help developing strategies to help myself. I don’t need your strategies, just your help in figuring out what will work for me. And I like simple and easy.

So, if we can work together on these things, with patience and understanding that I am doing my best, I think I will be more independent and have more confidence in what I can do for myself.

Thanks Mom, (or Dad) I know you want the best for me, but this is who I am right now. With your help I can grow in a positive, self-confident way and take on the world!

Love,

Your child/teen with ADHD

Summer Balance – What Does That Mean For You?

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juggler mom trying to balanceWe’ve all heard the term “work/life balance” and its implied connotation that it is possible to achieve a 50/50 balance between work and our other responsibilities to ourselves and our families. I believe that we each have to find our own sense of “balance” and the summer is the perfect time to change things up. What do you think?

Time Management

Time is the one resource that we cannot make more of so, we need to find ways to be more efficient. I am not talking about multi-tasking! When we truly multi-task we are actually flipping from one thing to another and it is about as effective as losing 20 IQ points.

However, here are a few things to think about:

  • Do you start each day with a prioritized plan?
  • Do you create time blocks to do similar tasks together?
  • Are you clear about your work and personal boundaries?
  • Can you take advantage of flexible hours, such as earlier or later start times or working longer to have a ½ or full day off, or working from home?
  • Do you have morning and evening routines that work for you with very little thought?

Recharging Your Batteries

When we make more time available, it is important that we know what we want to do with it. It can be as simple as taking time for a walk after dinner, or reading a book under a tree or more of a project like planning and taking a family vacation. Recharging activities just seem to be easier in the summer. Of course, this year we have had some extreme heat, so remember to stay hydrated and don’t overdo.

Think about:

  • Planning a weekend away or a vacation (and taking it)
  • Adding some exercise into your day by getting outside
  • Take advantage of farmer’s markets and fresh produce for healthy eating
  • Disconnect from technology now and then (Tech free Tuesdays, maybe?)
  • Spend more time with family and friends – picnics, bbqs, and get togethers
  • Take up a new hobby, or make time for an old one
  • Read
  • Garden
  • Start a meditation practice
  • Go to the beach

Whatever it is that helps you feel like you have taken advantage of the summer weather and feel more rested and energized, that’s what you need to do more of.

Thinking Ahead

Summer is also the time to check in on your goals, hopes and dreams for 2024 since we are halfway through the year. How are you doing (first name)? Is it time to revise or update those goals? What’s working in your life and what is not? We’ve been talking about balance, so what is it that would make your life feel more balanced? Don’t limit your thinking to just the summer because the transition to fall comes with the start of school and the winter holidays are not far behind. Sorry, don’t want to stress you out, but want to help you think more into the future. Picture your life as you would like it to be and then think about the steps that can get you there. What is one step you can do this week that will move you towards that “future you?”

Do you….

  • Need to adjust or make new goals for the second half of the year?
  • Want to take an online course or workshop to develop a skill?
  • Want to be more organized? What is the first step you can take?
  • Enjoy coming home? Is your home a sanctuary where you feel relaxed?
  • Take time for yourself each day?
  • Say “no?”
  • Get outside every day?

Just 15 minutes outdoors can have a relaxing effect on your stress level and blood pressure and recharges your brain with dopamine and endorphins. So, you’ll have more energy and be happier. What is your biggest take away from this newsletter? Let me know on my FB page.

How to Organize Any Space in 4 Easy Steps

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organizeSummer is coming – that’s the good news! We want to enjoy the summer but with graduations, weddings and bbqs happening every weekend, things can get ahead of us because we don’t have the time but we also don’t want to use what little time we do have on decluttering, so things can pile up- that’s the bad news.

You know that pile of mail (oh that’s right you handled that in last month’s newsletter) maybe it’s the family room or the kitchen that is frustrating you. If your very busy, overscheduled life is causing you to tolerate clutter then it is likely that you are losing valuable time dealing with its effects. The following four steps can be done separately or in tiny pieces depending on the time you have available. It’s easy to crack the C.O.D.E. to an organized life.

Each letter in the word CODE stands for a step in the process.

The “C” is for Collect.

Collect what needs to be organized or de-cluttered into one space. If it’s video games, cooking utensils, magazines, or laundry it doesn’t matter, just pick one and collect it all. You can get the whole family involved by having each person pick a “thing” and collect it in a laundry basket or plastic bin.

The “O” is for Organize.

Now organize the collection into sub categories by putting like items together. In the case of video games it might be by gaming platform, or separate kid’s games from teen games, or like and don’t like. With kitchen utensils it might be those you use often and those specialty items or the ones you use by the stove and those you use at the counter. As you do this with your category, you will notice what can be recycled or trashed, repurposed or removed to a different room. What is left is the important stuff – those things you love, use and/or need in your life.

Now “D” is for Decide.

This is often the hardest step of all. Asking yourself questions like, “What do I do with this?” or “Where is the best place for this?” can be difficult. Having the important things close by and the not so important (but still necessary) things away from the every day items will give you more space for the things you use daily. Some things may already have a place but began to overflow into the surrounding area. Now that you have collected those items you can sort, toss or pare down to suit your needs.

Wherever you decide to put things be sure to “contain” them. Things have a tendency to expand to fill all available space and by containing them you can curtail that. Draw dividers, kitchen organizers, bins, baskets, empty jars, storage bags, use whatever fits your need, will contain that category, and keep it from spreading. Now decide where each category is going and deal with them.

Last in the four step process is “E” for Evaluate.

After a week or so of using your new organization check the surrounding area to see if it is “contained” and evaluate if it is working for you. If not, then try something else. Keep trying until you find what works for you and your family. In order to maintain your organized home, be sure to evaluate each drawer, cabinet, closet or shelf periodically and use the C.O.D.E. to get it back under control. This is the key to staying organized – maintenance. It’ll also give you more time for summer fun. Enjoy!

Are You Enabling or Empowering Your Child?

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Empower don't enableWe all want our children to grow up to be responsible, successful members of society. Isn’t that what you want for your child? So, we “help” them at every turn so that they can make it to school on time, complete their homework perfectly, and get good grades.

But are you really helping or are you harming them?

Let me explain. If your child or teen has ADHD then you know that they struggle with routines, focus and remembering what they need to do as well as, doing what they know they need to do. You may feel that if you don’t remind your teen then they would never get out the door in the morning or finish their homework. And you may be right.

However, providing them with the information they need before they have had time to consider what comes next, does not help them develop the necessary skills to become independent instead it makes them dependent.

Think about these questions:

    1.  Are you helping your son or daughter create a routine to get out the door (with everything they need) or are you telling them what to do each day? (Ex. get your shoes on, did you brush your  teeth,  do you have your homework? And on and on.)
    2.  Are you empathizing and really trying to understand what they are feeling or are you just trying to solve their problem by telling them what they “should” do?
    3.  Are you checking their homework and making them correct it so that the teacher doesn’t know that they are struggling with it?
    4.  Are you reminding them of everything they have to do so that they don’t have to remember on their own?
    5.  Are you waking them up in the morning?

If you answered “yes” to even one of these questions, please keep reading because although you may think you are helping your children, in reality you are not. When you take away your child’s opportunity to problem solve by either telling them what they should do, or by doing it for them, not only do you handicap them from learning the skills but, you are chipping away at their self-esteem and self-confidence and fostering their dependence rather than independence.

For those with ADHD, learning routines and habits can take a bit longer than it does for those without ADHD (66 times). So it is important to start building the skills early so that by the time they get to high school, you have done your job and your teen is pretty independent. You want to feel confident that they can make it on their own at college. On the other hand, if you wait until they are a senior to start “letting go” and just drop the support you have been providing all along, they may not have the skills they need to succeed in college.

So, how can you empower them instead?

    1. Work on one thing at a time. Together decide what it will be. Empower your teen to come up with their own solutions just be sure to include how they want you to “support” them in this new process.
    2. Instead of saying you “should”…..try asking questions that lead to your teen figuring out their own solutions. Ex. “What do you think you could do to figure that out?” “How can you prevent that from happening again?”
    3. Learn about Executive Function skills so that you and your teen can better pinpoint which skill is weak. Is it getting started on things (task initiation), remembering (working memory) or finishing things (task completion) etc.? Weaknesses can occur in several executive functions but often there are EFs that are strengths as well. What looks like several areas of weakness could be the same EF showing up in a different context. How can you use the strengths to help compensate for the weaknesses?
    4. Change comes from within but here are three questions to ask that can help. Can the environment be changed to better accommodate for the weakness? Can the task be broken down into more manageable steps so that it is not so overwhelming? Does there need to be a system or a routine created to assist in solving this?
    5. Lastly, consider whether or not you are too close to the situation to really be able to help, or if you are finding it difficult to remain nonjudgmental then it may be time to find an Executive Function Coach or Counselor to work with your teen.

Jodi Sleeper-Triplett said this in her book Empowering Youth with ADHD:

…empowerment is about much more than helping the young person with ADHD accomplish goals: It’s about helping the young person identify strengths and resources; practice thinking about how to solve problems and meet goals; build skills; develop a positive self-image; and ultimately, lay a foundation for long-term success in the days, months and years to come. (p35)

And who doesn’t want that for their teen?

Basic Week Routine to the Rescue!

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Routines save timeThere are two kinds of people – those that love routines and those that don’t. Which are you?

If you don’t love routines, it may be because you feel they are too restrictive, too boring or just too hard. After all, who wants to do something 66 times before it becomes automatic?

However, if you know the value of routines, then you probably appreciate the automaticity of it – following through without any real effort or brain power. Routines can keep your life on track when everything around you is falling apart. Instead of constantly trying to juggle all that is on your plate, a routine can add structure to your day and save you time, effort and money.

Routines

The most common routines are the morning, or get out of the house routine, and an evening, get ready for bed routine. There are all kinds of routines and frequencies for doing them. I encourage the students I work with to create a homework routine. They think of all the steps they should take before, during and after homework and then combine them into a routine that works for them. It may include what to do when they get home such as having a snack, taking an activity break, a body check, checking the agenda and deciding what’s important – all before even getting started. Students save themselves time by addressing all the usual distractions like hunger, thirst, feeling tired, and the “I don’t know where to start”, dilemma.

Create A Basic Week Plan

You can do the same thing by creating a routine for the things you do during your week. I call it a “basic week plan”, because it tells me when to do the basic things each week. Start with a list of the things you spend time doing throughout a typical week for yourself and your family; things like laundry, grocery shopping, bill paying, etc. If you’ve ever had to run to the grocery store for something you need for dinner that is already late, or had to pay a late fee, or missed the return window on an item that you don’t want, you know it can disrupt your day and steal valuable time you could use for yourself.

Now that you have your list, decide which day of the week would fit with your regular schedule rather than having “urgency” dictate the use of your time.

Match the task to a day:

Task                                                             Day

Laundry                                                            Monday

Groceries/Meal Planning                              Tuesday

Cleaning                                                           Wednesday

Errands                                                             Thursday

Mail/Paperwork                                              Friday

Organizing/Planning/Household Maintenance

Once you decide on the day of the week, try it out. See what it feels like to get the big stuff done during the week and have your weekend for fun and relaxation.

With fewer random or spontaneous tasks and errands taking up what little free time you have in your life, you may find the benefits of a basic week plan far outweigh the rigidity you think of in a routine. And wouldn’t it be nice to reduce the stress and the hurry in your day and to also have some time for yourself?

Recap:

  • Routines add structure to your day
  • Routines take less brain power and prevent decision fatigue
  • Routines, like a basic week plan, save you time and effort by minimizing extra errands and last-minute trips
  • Routines save money
  • Routines keep life moving even through the bumpy times

What do you need a routine for?

Action Today = Better Learning Tomorrow

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Reading books, lots of themCalling all parents….do you want to help your child/teen complete their homework more efficiently, study more effectively for tests and ultimately improve their learning and their grades?

Time is running out. We’re in term 3. The early Spring is often the most difficult time for students to stay motivated and to keep up with their work. Keep it positive and read on for tips to put into action today for better results tomorrow.

Homework Efficiency:

        • Work together to set a homework routine. Include a specific start time.
        • Create a distraction free environment – TV off even if it is in another room. Phones on airplane mode or out of the room.
        • Do not interrupt them while they are working as they can lose their focus.
        • Do not “check” their homework accuracy, that is the teacher’s job.
        • Make sure they take short, 5-10 minute, breaks after working for 20-30 minutes. It helps the brain recharge and allows the brain to process new information.

Study Effectively:

    • Encourage students to write down upcoming test dates and then to plan backwards so that they have at least 3 opportunities to review the information before the test. Spaced repetition has been shown to be an effective study technique.
    • Foster a growth mindset, discourage negative self-talk and focus on the positives. Punishments do not encourage better grades.
    • Simply reading new information retains maybe 10% but being an active learner by asking questions, summarizing the reading, drawing a mindmap, or creating flashcards leads to more retention and better understanding of concepts.
    • Have your child “teach” you or even the dog, key concepts. They need to be able to explain them in their own words and just not verbatim from the text or study guide. Quiz them on vocabulary, including math vocabulary to be sure they understand what the words means.
    • Don’t save studying until after the homework, as it is best when the brain is fresh and energized

Improve Learning:

    • Eat together whenever you can and engage in meaningful conversations about various topics. Discussions promote communication skills, critical thinking and listening skills and develops confidence.
    • Read. Whether it is reading to your child, with your child or they are reading independently, show that reading is important by reading at the same time.
    • Make learning fun by going to museums, libraries, zoos and vacationing activities that promote learning new things.
    • Encourage their interests and provide opportunities to explore hobbies, deep dive into subjects of interest and use their skills in the “real world.” (Ex. Baking, cooking dinner, planning a vacation, or researching a topic.)
    • Praise your child’s efforts and encourage them to see challenges as opportunities to learn and not as failures. Take the emphasis off of the grades and focus it on encouraging them to become lifelong learners capable of learning anything they set their mind to.

That’s how we encourage learning and growing and can develop the habits and routines that all students need to be successful. It only takes one “bad” experience in a subject to demotivate and defeat an otherwise very capable student.

Graphic thanks to Pixabay.

Use Your ADHD Super Powers and Get More Done!

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ADHD Super PowersJanuary 1st is meant to encourage thoughts of possibilities but it can also be a reminder of the previous year’s disappointments. For 2024, let’s make a deal, there’s enough negativity in the world, let’s focus on the positive this year. Are you in?

It’s time to embrace our neurodiversity and use our strengths to get things done. Every January there are numerous resolution strategies offered to make this your “best year ever”. Strategies such as having a word, theme, or intention for the year are plentiful. Setting SMART goals and breaking them down into small action steps may work for some, but the statistics say differently. Many people give up within two weeks of the new year. Here’s a clip from npr.org for reasons why.

This year though, let’s try to make small improvements using our ADHD Super Powers such as: being creative and thinking outside the box, being a problem solver, having high energy and being able to pivot when necessary. Also, let’s not forget the ability to hyperfocus.

If the goal is to “get the right things done,” then let’s see how the ADHD Super Powers can help.

Super Power: You are creative:

Your ideas are innovative, often more involved than they need to be, but still creative and you often come up with non-traditional solutions that can solve problems. Watch for places where a creative solution could save you time and energy and fix it when you can. For example:

    • If you have been procrastinating on a task, add some creativity to it, gamify it, break it down into teeny, tiny doable steps to easily cross off or work on it with a friend.
    • Make it a game with the family to race around and put things away so you start each day fresh
    • Dislike using a traditional planner, then create your own system by making it work for you and the way you think.

Super Power: You have high energy:

Your energy level is often directly related to your level of motivation and of course the basics like sleep and self-care. If you find yourself with lots of energy to spare:

    • Knocking off several mini tasks will keep the dopamine level up and that makes everything easier.
    • Be sure to have a list to look at filled with those mini tasks so you don’t have to try and think of them in the moment.
    • Keep track of all you do accomplish – it’s much better to focus on what did get done rather than what didn’t.

Super Power: You can pivot quickly and change course or task:

If something more urgent comes up you are able to change gears and quickly dive into it. You are often multi-tasking and that means you are only using 50% of your brain (because you are actually switching from one task to the other and back) but you can assess what is needed and get on it. If you do have to pivot:

    • Be sure to leave yourself a note of where to pick up on the current project, before you jump to the urgent one.
    • You are able to find ways to make things easier and are open to unexpected solutions
    • Life happens – when the unexpected happens, being able to easily pivot can provide other options and solutions minimizing the disruptions.

Super Power: You can Hyperfocus:

Hyperfocus is the ability to sustain attention and focus on the task at hand until it is complete. This often entails either high interest on your part, a looming deadline, or urgency from someone else. It does use up a lot of brain power so be careful how often you use it.

    • You have the ability to deep dive into a project or area of interest so set a timer or reminder notification before beginning so you don’t miss something else.
    • Use hyperfocus to develop the skills needed for a new hobby or a side hustle.
    • The increase in focus can lead to more creative solutions and an increase in attention to details that may not happen with frequent interruptions. Let others around you know that you don’t want to be interrupted.

A change in perspective is needed if you feel that your ADHD is the reason you “can’t” get things done, are always late or forget things. Use your ADHD superpowers to come up with creative strategies and solutions for those challenges and add some fun into each day. What do you want to remember 2024 for? What do you need to do to make that a reality? Use your super powers:-)

Secrets to Helping Kids with ADHD

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ADHD signsADHD, is it a superpower or kryptonite at home or at school? The truth is, it is probably both depending on the situation. All students want to learn, they often feel a great deal of pressure to “learn” and be able to show that learning when it is called for. How can you help your child learn to use their ADHD as a superpower and minimize the effects of kryptonite? Here are three ways to ensure better outcomes.

ADHD and the Brain

    1. Understand that ADHD is a chemical imbalance in the brain. That means that without enough dopamine and other neurotransmitter chemicals, messages are disrupted on their way from one side of the brain to the other. When everything is working the messages make it, but often they make it half way or more likely, they vanish – sometimes temporarily and other times, without a trace – forgotten.

Probable causes: interruptions, distractions or brain and body are trying to make their needs known. Working memory is responsible for holding onto all the information we need at the time to complete a task or solve a problem. When it is working at capacity and something or someone interrupts, something has to go. Sometimes it is easy to get it back and other times, your child has to start back at the beginning adding more time and stress to whatever they were doing.

When an ADHD brain is hungry, thirsty, tired or fidgety, it is best to stop and give it what it needs. The brain is always monitoring and sends out signals to get noticed until the problem is resolved.

Suggestions: Make sure your child or teen gets enough sleep, eats healthy, is active and has a snack with protein before beginning homework. Praise their effort. Remove distractions that you can and save your questions for later.

2. Impulsivity is often a kryptonite side effect of ADHD. It is like the pause button is broken, or that little voice in your head that warns you before you get in trouble or hurt, is asleep. I have also heard that it is a way the brain seeks out more stimulus because it is feeling like it doesn’t have enough. Impulse control is an executive function that isn’t fully developed until age 25, yet we ask children to control it long before then. Whatever the reasons, kids need a way to help themselves before they get in trouble.

Suggestions: One way to separate the impulsivity from the child is to call it something. Give it a name that you can refer to that separates it from your child’s sense of self. (Ex. The Cracken, Kevin (from the movie UP, Wacko Willy, etc.) Use humor when they show up and discuss what else Wacko Willy might have done instead.

Set clear expectations on behaviors before going somewhere. Make sure your child has a fidget in their pocket and use this 3-step model taken from Sarah Ward called: Stop, Think, Act.

When you notice emotions are building up, your child needs to: Stop (Take a few breaths, walk away, go outside, or chill in their room). Then have them think what started that, or what happened right before they got upset? Now, problem solve and brainstorm ideas that are more appropriate and use them to act next time.

3. Motivation is a challenge. An ADHD brain struggles with tasks that are boring, complex or difficult. If you are trying to motivate your child to complete something that falls under one of those categories, it may be as frustrating for you as it is for them. No one wants to mess up but, often those with ADHD are seen as messing up more often than their peers. The most common ways teachers and parents try to motivate is to take-away privileges. Or promising rewards so far in the future that the child feels they will never get it anyway. Rewards or punishments have little effect other than making children feel “bad” about themselves. This causes the brain to become stressed and a stressed brain cannot think clearly. That seems like a no-win situation.

Suggestions: According to Additude Magazine, “When you praise your child, it creates dopamine — the neurotransmitter his or her brain lacks, which causes the ADHD symptoms — and the dopamine helps to better control behavior. So, he or she can do more wonderful tomorrow.”  Increase the positive/negative ratio as it takes 3-5 positives to outweigh 1 negative.

Learning happens when students are willing to learn, and have strategies that work for them. However, most important is that they feel good about themselves. So, use lots of praise (about their effort), humor and help them understand how they learn best. If school is a positive experience, then their superpower may one day make the world a better place.

Want to learn more strategies to help your child or teen succeed with ADHD? Then join our next Thriving with ADHD in the Family Parent Class.

Are You on Santa’s Stressed List?

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Santa's Stessed ListStress. It’s a word we hear every day and I am sure it means different things to each of us (including our kids). The World Health Organization defines stress as, “a state of worry or mental tension caused by a difficult situation. It is a natural human response that prompts us to address challenges and threats to our lives.”  Back in the “early” days, stress was meant to protect us from the dangers out in the world and keep us safe. These days it feels more like a byproduct of our everyday lives. Even the general pace of our society can sometimes (no, probably often at this time of year) feel like it is going too fast for us to process and is one stressful event after another.

Just to be clear, I am talking about the stress we bring on ourselves – the temporary type* that can often be mitigated if we had the ability for “do-overs.” Think about the last time you stopped and realized you were feeling overly stressed. What happened just before that?

Common Stressors:

      • Did you say, “yes” to one or ten more things you knew you didn’t have time for?
      • Or did you forget something important and then had to scramble to make it right?
      • Did you lose something important?
      • Were you late for an appointment?
      • Did you stay up later than you knew you should?

All of these, and many more can increase your stress level. Imagine if you could rewind time and try again. Would you be able to identify what got in the way and caused your stress and then be able to prevent it (or at least reduce its impact)? What would that feel like?

Now figure out what you can do to get that feeling.

What ideas did you come up with? I know you are in the mad, almost the holidays rush but, maybe you can make some notes for next year.  Trust me, your “future self” will thank you if you leave some hints and actions to take to manage your stress level.

Here are some ideas to think about:

      • Get more sleep (dark rooms, lowering lights in the evening and using lamps not overheads)
      • Exercise
      • Build a self-care toolbox of things that help recharge you and schedule time in for you
      • Create routines that work for you and the family
      • Limit changes to plans at the last minute – it is okay to say “no”
      • Feeling prepared helps melt stress so make a realistic plan and then work it
      • Smart tech use – sure the dopamine hit feels good at the time but then that time is gone
      • No negative self-talk – your brain believes what it hears
      • Declutter the things you no longer need and that only interfere with you being able to find what you need quickly
      • Lastly, organize your spaces. Where is the logical spot for that? Where would a hook work for your keys? What would make your life easier and save you time? Add that to your to do list.

When you understand you have options, you can take action. Even baby steps in the right direction, will still get you there.

Four Productivity Hacks for an ADHD Brain

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ADHD signsOctober is National ADHD Awareness Month and so in tribute, let’s bring some awareness to how ADHD can interfere in your life and what you can do about it. First of all, ADHD or its side effects, has nothing to do with intelligence. It has a neurobiological (read chemical) basis related to the neurotransmitter hormone levels in your brain. Those chemicals are responsible for transmitting messages from one side of the brain to the other. Sometimes they complete their mission and sometimes you forget part or all of that previous thought.

ADHD is often related to weaknesses in Executive Function skills. Those are the processes that are the last to fully develop and are in the pre-frontal cortex of the brain. It’s interesting that those EFs (task initiation, inhibit, monitor, planning/organization, working memory, organization of materials, cognitive and behavioral shift and task completion) are necessary for completing most projects (and homework too).

It’s easy to see how difficulty planning can cause us to work harder and longer than we really need to simply because our plan is not the most efficient or cohesive. When that happens, we also may have difficulty getting started, and then watch out when our emotions take over. Can we notice how things are going or do we just jump up and go do something else? When a simple shift in our method, environment or state of mind or body may be all that is needed to stay focused.

An ADHD brain often finds it difficult to persist through boring, complex or difficult tasks as it prefers creative, interesting and fun projects – who doesn’t? When faced with this dilemma, it will seek out stimulation that it prefers and that’s where distractibility comes in. The brain is searching for something to make it “happy” and so it distracts us. Once distracted, since we weren’t monitoring the situation, it is challenging to regain control (inhibit our response) and all that we were holding in our working memory may be forgotten. Thus, adding more time to a task we didn’t want to do in the first place. Making it impossible to complete the task.

So, often it is the brain that is interfering in our ability to complete tasks and not our intelligence, age or state of overwhelm (although that has its own issues). Knowing that, we can be on the lookout for signs and use strategies and routines to mitigate its impact.

Brain and Body Check

First, we want to be sure our brain has everything it needs to be happy. The brain is continually sensing and responding to variations from the norm so it needs to have certain things like food, water, sleep, and safety to begin with. I would also add that stress can impact the brain as well. The higher the stress the less the brain can think and it sets off the fear alarms. Do what you can to be sure the brain and body have what they need and anticipate any needs that may come up while you are working.

Find What Helps Your ADHD Brain Focus

Check around you. Is your environment filled with distractions? Are there any changes you can make to reduce the irritating distractions and include some more helpful ones? Remove the clutter, face away from the window, turn off the TV, add some music, maybe add a few photos that make you smile or a small plant for some fresh oxygen. Read a previous post called Hack Your Workspace for more helpful tips.

Make A Plan

I confess, I am a paper planner (with digital backup) enthusiast. It doesn’t matter if you prefer a notebook, planner, digital calendar, master task list or a spreadsheet but you need to find a way to hold onto the tasks, appointments and ideas that are important to you. If you ask your brain to hold that info, it can hold 5-7 things until something distracts it and your working memory deletes it all. I am sure your task list is longer than 7 items. (The master task list that is….not the plan for today.) Whether you like to plan your day the night before or just start fresh in the morning – here are three questions to ask yourself.

  1. What are my 3 priorities for today?
  2. How much time do I have to spend on each?
  3. Where can I schedule the time to work on each into my day? (Taking into account my energy levels and other commitments in the day)

Work the Plan

Now that you took the time to make the plan, respect it. Don’t ignore the timeframes, if you scheduled a task for a specific time, do it then. Do not wait until you “feel” like it – because that rarely (if ever) happens. In fact, if you are easily distracted, you may want to set an alarm for 15 minutes. Then check in with yourself that you are still focused on the task.

Each task should be a single step and you may have several for each project. If you think about what the end needs to look like, you can easily work backwards to get the individual tasks that need to happen. Each project has a beginning, middle and ending, all the way to the clean up of any materials you used and other completion tasks.

Adults may be able to maintain focus for about 90 minutes, but if that is not you then be sure to break your “on task” time into manageable blocks and take breaks in between. The Pomodoro method uses 25-minute work blocks and a 5-minute break in between. After 4-Pomodoros, a longer break is encouraged. You can see how it works by joining our Work it Wednesday Focus group Wednesdays at 10am ET.

Whenever you stop working for the day, take the time to “close out the day.” That means leave a note of where to pick up tomorrow. Figure out your priorities for tomorrow and any responsibilities you may have at specific times. Check off what you completed. Savor the moment. That’s right, too often we don’t take time to appreciate and congratulate ourselves on what we did accomplish. A “done list” really helps us see our successes and can be motivating too. Clear off your workspace and set it up for tomorrow.

Work with your brain and your energy levels by frequently checking in with yourself. Take time to reward yourself and recharge your batteries. There will always be more to do, just make sure it is worthy of your time and effort.